star.trip

star.trip

Student
Oct 6, 2024
136
I always try to help others but I recognize that I have a hard time getting someone to help me. I don't know, it's like I feel I don't deserve it because I make so many mistakes. And the fear is that I will be whipped for those mistakes.

I feel comfortable here, I apologize because I don't think this is the thread to express it but it feels good.
 
  • Hugs
  • Love
Reactions: fleetingnight, CTB Dream and not-2-b-the-answer
EvisceratedJester

EvisceratedJester

|| What Else Could I Be But a Jester ||
Oct 21, 2023
3,397
I'm not feeling great. It took me way too long to catchup on all my school work, so I ended up only getting to study last minute. I am definitely going to be failing this exam. Doesn't help that my prof, as good as he is at teaching, seems to really love making overly difficult exams for this students. The last one was a pain in the ass and I have a feeling that this one is going to be worse. I am screwed...
Well, I definitely failed that exam. Funny, because it was easier than the last one yet I honestly feel like I probably did worse on this one. Probably doesn't help that I studied last minute, lol (mostly because it was taking me a long time to catch up on my lectures for that class). I'm too tired to give a shit.
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: ijustwishtodie, fleetingnight, not-2-b-the-answer and 1 other person
BlendedHeart

BlendedHeart

It is what it is
Mar 9, 2024
206
Even my dreams are tormenting me. Showing me situations that never came to be and never will. Showing me people that doesn't care about me anymore. Giving me useless hope. The moment I wake up, all that optimism vanishes and gives place to sorrow and melancholy.
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: ijustwishtodie, not-2-b-the-answer, fleetingnight and 1 other person
cicatrezESP

cicatrezESP

in the time of the sixth sun
Oct 6, 2024
56
i'm living inside a nightmare
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: not-2-b-the-answer, fleetingnight and CTB Dream
CTB Dream

CTB Dream

Injury damage disabl hard talk no argu make fun et
Sep 17, 2022
2,532
Alws dtriort no stop no know wat do
 
  • Hugs
  • Aww..
Reactions: BlendedHeart, ijustwishtodie, not-2-b-the-answer and 3 others
Phantomygg

Phantomygg

Member
Sep 21, 2023
22
I feel hopeless and feel like everyone around me hates me
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: not-2-b-the-answer, fleetingnight and CTB Dream
cotton

cotton

If we could just re-focus...
Nov 6, 2024
69
Anger and restraint at the things I need to do and want to do but I can't deal with the thing that's in my way at the moment.
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: not-2-b-the-answer, fleetingnight and CTB Dream
Thisisnotaname

Thisisnotaname

Experienced
Aug 27, 2024
271
I can't even talk about my life and throughts since someone knows I had an account here 🥺
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: CTB Dream, not-2-b-the-answer and fleetingnight
delora

delora

Lola (she/her)
Jun 5, 2023
54
I feel plagued with the burden of living on for the sake of another.

Can't estimate the sheer amount of times I just thought: fuck, none of this would be happening if I was dead. And yet, I live.

I've been struggling with my thoughts again. Every time I think it might be getting better, it's only a matter of time until it all comes back. The uncertainty, the insecurity. The feeling that I might never be fully comfortable or at peace. I am tired.
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: Forever Sleep, CTB Dream and not-2-b-the-answer
Kimlett

Kimlett

Member
Jan 7, 2024
67
I'm feeling bored, unmotivated, aphathetic. My life makes no sense and I'm struggling to find a reason to keep living other than not hurting my family.
 
  • Informative
  • Hugs
Reactions: CTB Dream and not-2-b-the-answer
darkenmydoorstep

darkenmydoorstep

Not Waving But Browned Off….
Sep 27, 2023
534
Exhausted and begging for the mercy of death. So fed up with this existence. I so wish I could give it to someone else who wanted it. Like a life transplant. Maybe one day we'll be able to? Donate our entire body everything by euthanasia for parts. How brilliant would that be. Offers benefitting from this waste and it being an honourable thing to do.
 
  • Hugs
  • Love
  • Like
Reactions: ijustwishtodie, LifeQuitter, Forever Sleep and 2 others
trashhologram

trashhologram

⚰ Baby, let me decompose ⚰
Dec 15, 2023
325
It's so fucking annoying that when you're a sex worker existing online people ask stupid questions about my job in threads that don't have shit to do with it. Ugh. Drinking rooibos and petting a cat is nice though.
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: CTB Dream and not-2-b-the-answer
F

Forever Sleep

Earned it we have...
May 4, 2022
9,396
I'm just fed up most of the time. Maybe it's not the worst emotion to have but, it's exhausting when it's almost all the time. I just don't like my reality and I've got it to as good as I think it's going to get! It's clear to me what I should do but, I don't feel that I can right now and I wonder how long I'm going to have to keep fighting to tread water when all I want to say is: F*CK THIS!

Thank you. End of today's rant.
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: star.trip and not-2-b-the-answer
Dr Iron Arc

Dr Iron Arc

Into the Unknown
Feb 10, 2020
20,968
Can't sleep again. I think the emptiness of my soul is keeping me awake. It's so loud. The void is calling to me, or maybe that's just my own inner angst crying to be sedated like some kind of whiny baby.
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: not-2-b-the-answer
Proxycake

Proxycake

Matrimony
Feb 20, 2023
73
There is nothing in this world, or in my own life that could ever push me into wanting to live.
 
  • Like
  • Hugs
Reactions: LifeQuitter, not-2-b-the-answer and ijustwishtodie
ijustwishtodie

ijustwishtodie

death will be my ultimate bliss
Oct 29, 2023
4,783
I am scared. I feel nothing but fear. Not just fear regarding suicide (not that I can access any anyway) but fear regarding life itself and having to live. I'm scared that I'm trapped in existence until natural death. I'm scared of all of the suffering that I have to endure. I'm scared of every hardship and struggle that I have to go through. I'm scared that I will go homeless in the future because I am unable to conform to society. I AM SO SCARED AND I WANT A WAY OUT OF HERE :(
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: NoPoint2Life and not-2-b-the-answer
xtra_cheesecurds

xtra_cheesecurds

cheeser
Nov 10, 2024
3
I feel very neutral right now. I'm trying to call my friend right now, but he isn't responding (even though he said he would) so I'm a little bit antsy as well regarding that. Nonetheless, I feel fine as of right now. :)
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: not-2-b-the-answer
fleetingnight

fleetingnight

incapable of shutting up
May 2, 2024
634
Like the stupidest person alive. I've done almost nothing a whole week, despite the fact I've hardly slept, so I'd have more time to do things. I know I'm entirely useless, so why do I keep on trying?
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: Mirrory Me and not-2-b-the-answer
Tuonetar_

Tuonetar_

Member
Sep 18, 2024
39
Needed to get some stuff done but I slept the day away, as usual. I wish I didn't find everything in life to be so exhausting.
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: not-2-b-the-answer
cinnamonstix

cinnamonstix

New Member
Nov 11, 2024
3
Heartbroken and defeated. I wish his words had real love behind them, I've never felt more alone
 
  • Hugs
  • Aww..
Reactions: Mirrory Me, brickedup, not-2-b-the-answer and 1 other person
OldManOfTheLake

OldManOfTheLake

Member
Nov 11, 2024
12
Things are bad at my workplace. People are crying because of the election. We have a large LGBTQ+ population at my workplace (I am in that community as well) and it's so bad. I had a nervous breakdown last week and has put me in a horrible position. I may have slammed the door shut on a PhD position from my nervous breakdown.

If I do CTB. It's going to be a long post. I am an old fart and have lived a wild life. I'm preparing my post and preparing my method.


I don't see how things are getting better other than a miracle. These are very dark times.
 
  • Hugs
  • Aww..
Reactions: TANETS and not-2-b-the-answer
brickedup

brickedup

angel
Oct 30, 2024
15
my family doesn't trust me, and my bf + his family doesn't trust me either. i messed up. i want out, i want to end it all, to restart.
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: Mirrory Me and not-2-b-the-answer
trashhologram

trashhologram

⚰ Baby, let me decompose ⚰
Dec 15, 2023
325
I hate being broke just because the bureaucratic offices can't understand what I've written to them. I have less than a damn euro and a bitch is like "I'll see what I can do". Well, guess I won't eat. Fuck this stupid recovery from an eating disorder, I'm going back to restricting so I can afford anything else I need. I don't need much food. Fuck this life.
 
N

NoPoint2Life

Why is this so hard?
Aug 31, 2024
263
I am pissed I have to go for OCD therapy in a little bit because I don't think I'm capable of making any more progress so what's the point. At least my therapist is super nice.
And I'm kind of freaking out lately because I've noticed my hands shake a lot and my balance is really horrible. I don't know if it's a result of me being 44 and not exercising a single bit my entire life or if I'm getting some horrible disease that is about to make my existence even worse
 
TANETS

TANETS

Droplets of rain rest on the faces like tears
Nov 11, 2024
23
Scared about the future. It's not paranoia if it's continuously getting worst everyday.
 

Similar threads

Gstreater
Replies
3
Views
117
Suicide Discussion
-Link-
-Link-
-nobodyknows-
Replies
6
Views
164
Suicide Discussion
iloveyouihateyou
iloveyouihateyou