Venting on damage

[Spock87]

As long as I can remember I always wanted to die but after many attempts felt that I needed to reset during my reset I met my husband after 13 years of marriage we have 2 beautiful daughters. These kids have been keeping my head above the water for so long I don't think they know how many times they saved me. Today during group therapy both my kids unleash what was bothering them and I realized I was the problem and know in my heart the more I stay alive the more damage I'm causing and I know if I stay I will destroy them but I'm ready to do what any mother will do to protect her cubs even if it means I do it myself I'm also broken hearted that I won't see them growing up but I know my best friend has my back on that

 

[Snarlax]

I'm not saying that you are not causing harm to your children, but you seem to believe that ending your life would actually be a selfless act towards them. The truthfulness of that statemant is not up to you to decide. I don't believe that your children want to see you dead, so I suggest you talk them honestly before you convince yourself that your death would be good for them.

People talk a lot here about how selfish it is to have children, but also about how noone listens to what they actually want in life. Well, now it's your turn to communicate with your children.

You are depressed and suicidal, which you have every rigth to be, but now you have also been hurt, so you might have reason to doubt the voice "deep in your heart".

 

[WhiteRabbit]

I don't know your exact situation, but I feel like if you put every kid in the world in group therapy most of them would say their parents are causing problems in their life, especially if they're teen/pre-teens. I think it's pretty normal and it doesn't necessarily mean you're a bad parent.

 

[wantittoendsoon]

I don't know why you think you are damaging your kids, but maybe talking to them and making some changes would help. Best of Luck.

 

[tiredone]

Try talking with them honestly. I am in similar situation, and I do start to belive that loosing parent would be one of worst things you can do to them. While ago i was convinced that they can get through me being gone, but as i start to realise, that will damage them more than being here, even miserable( as long as no abuse is involved). You will do whatever you decide, just my view.