CantWait2D1E
Archaon, Herald of the Apocalypse
- Dec 24, 2022
- 146
Browsing the hub when I see her among the trending searches, and I just have to stop the act and think.
She literally achieved more than I ever will in a lifetime, and successfully CTB'd in less time. I'm 24 and she died at 23.
-Internet stardom being the first one. She is still one of the top 100 actresses even 5 years after her death. Despite the thousands who came before her and the thousands that came after.
-Was absurdly beautiful and desirable. Coulda landed any of the guys who watched her vids who in turn would've tried giving her the world.
-Got married. Although it doesn't say much of their relationship if she CTBd a year after it happened its still one of the things I'd like to experience that I probably never will
-prolly made more money than I ever will
-lastly, wasn't bad at death. No failed attempts, no waiting around for some miracle method like N. Just grabbed some rope and went out to the park.
She just makes me feel like I really suck. At everything.
Two questions come into my mind during this. Why am I even still here? Are these emotions valid if I'm still able to write about them? Why haven't I just grabbed some neckties or unplugged this Ethernet cable and got this over with? Instead I'm just existing and squirming about my life like some pathetic little worm?
Second question. Was she ever on this site? Or one like it? Did she ever get to talk about how she was really feeling with understanding people like I have? And did she get a little help with her method or was it just something done on a whim one day no guidance needed.
Sorry if this thread is stupid I'm just tired of my spank the monkey sessions getting ruined.
She literally achieved more than I ever will in a lifetime, and successfully CTB'd in less time. I'm 24 and she died at 23.
-Internet stardom being the first one. She is still one of the top 100 actresses even 5 years after her death. Despite the thousands who came before her and the thousands that came after.
-Was absurdly beautiful and desirable. Coulda landed any of the guys who watched her vids who in turn would've tried giving her the world.
-Got married. Although it doesn't say much of their relationship if she CTBd a year after it happened its still one of the things I'd like to experience that I probably never will
-prolly made more money than I ever will
-lastly, wasn't bad at death. No failed attempts, no waiting around for some miracle method like N. Just grabbed some rope and went out to the park.
She just makes me feel like I really suck. At everything.
Two questions come into my mind during this. Why am I even still here? Are these emotions valid if I'm still able to write about them? Why haven't I just grabbed some neckties or unplugged this Ethernet cable and got this over with? Instead I'm just existing and squirming about my life like some pathetic little worm?
Second question. Was she ever on this site? Or one like it? Did she ever get to talk about how she was really feeling with understanding people like I have? And did she get a little help with her method or was it just something done on a whim one day no guidance needed.
Sorry if this thread is stupid I'm just tired of my spank the monkey sessions getting ruined.
