Help What is actually wrong with self harm?

[coinlockerbaby]

I've been told that I need to stop self harming over and over. But when I ask why, I feel like I have never had a satisfactory answer.
SH helps me cope through my emotions, and it's not like I'm dying (which, yaknow, most people believe is bad). So why should I stop if it's just another way of helping?

 

[アホペンギン]

My father told me a few years ago that he doesn't understand why people do SH, he knows why people do it but doesn't understand how it works. SH isn't bad, it just redirects the mind from mental pain to physical pain which is much easier to handle, especially after being in pain mentally for a long time. It feels so nice to be released from that pressure, SH isn't at all bad if you take care of the wounds and be careful not to cut too deep, etc.

 

[Baldwin IV]

My take is thatm it's a coping mechanism that is really not sustainable from either a emotional or physical point of view. Since it helps you cope with whatever internal pain you're going through, but not entirely. To me it's futile, because it reminds me that hurting myself is the only thing I have control over, but that is kind of like the point so I understand why people do it, and why I did it. To be granted it depends how severe is the damage you're inflicting to yourself. I just think there are other ways to cope with it, but I realize everyone's situation is different.

 

[passivethought121]

In my opinion the only possible thing wrong is the chance for infection, sepsis, and death. But that's only if someone wishes to avoid those things.

I feel like there's genuinely no issue and people just find it ugly. People still find a reason to get mad even when I tell them I properly clean and bandage my cuts that aren't even deep.

 

[Sakura.]

I've been told that I need to stop self harming over and over. But when I ask why, I feel like I have never had a satisfactory answer.
SH helps me cope through my emotions, and it's not like I'm dying (which, yaknow, most people believe is bad). So why should I stop if it's just another way of helping?

Hi, coinlockerbaby! Tomorrow is your birthday! Happy birthday!

 

[RustedandWeathered]

What's actually wrong with cutting myself? It's not like I'm cutting to the bone or anything. The deepest I've MAYBE gone is hypodermis. So therefore it's fine. People need to stop acting like it's an existential crisis when someone is self harming.

 

[Cauliflour]

Do these people not realise that self harm is an addiction? It's all well and good at first when you're self harming cause you've got mental shit you wanna sort out easily, but then the self harm starts adding it's own mental shit into the mix and now it's a routine to rip capillaries and pray it doesn't get infected. I've been self harming for years and I can feel the effects of this addiction easily just by not cutting for like 2 weeks and suddenly I'm depressed with no motivation and self harm is now one of the few things that I can identify as a "good" feeling causing all sorts of obsession nonsense around it (that and autism being a right bitch but that's another story). Not to mention years of stress just trying to keep the scars covered so my family and other people don't point them out and drag me into an uncomfortable conversation. Please, for the love of god, don't phrase self harm like it's a viable long term solution. It seems fine when you start it but eventually it'll bite you in the ass. So much mental crap has branched off me using a knife as a coping mechanism that one time when I was younger and nobody treated me seriously or cared to listen to my point of view, just trying to traumatise me in the process, so now my brain has formed in a way that I really don't think I can function anymore without self harm. So much of my emotional regulation is built around hurting myself and that's not okay!

If you're an active self harmer, for my sake, please use your experience to find another way to cope. Otherwise you'll end up like me with 2 arms that look like baguettes and an inability to just let the skin heal because I'm so used to seeing scars on my arms that I'm treating it like some kind of edgy tattoo to get horny over.

I do see where some of you are coming from though, it is infuriating to not have your motives fully understood by others with people treating you like you're insane. I get it, I do this shit for fun. Reminds me of day drinking.

 

[DamnDahm]

In my opinion, everyone should be able to do with themselves what they want as long as they are not risking others without the consent of the other party.

I'm not condoning self harm, as I understand It can be harmful for both mental and physical health but I am tired of people telling others to stop [myself included] for the simple reason of "it's bad"

 

[Suicidalastronaut]

Yeah no mental professional has given me a valid answer as to why I shouldn't harm myself. It helps and it keeps people away from.

 

[adamantc]

It's not wrong -- it is a better and safer coping method for some, as compared to other methods. However, its visibility and negative connotations means that self harmers are stigmatised by society and mistreated and sidelined. Because of my scars ( past), I have been looked upon unfavorably and I have lost many opportunities that would have otherwise been available to me.

 

[dagger_of_truth]

I see it as punishing the victim. It only adds injury to everything else they're going through. We're not the problem, society is the problem. But society convinces us that we're the problem. Then society blames the people who harm the problem that society has designated. So it's like society has found a way to get people to harm themselves even in the absence of other people, and then uses that as justification to further designate them as the problem. Besides survival instinct, that's probably the biggest reason I could never self-harm personally. I just see it as perpetuating the abuse of society even in isolation, and the whole point of isolation for me is to feel safe and relax.