What are you ashamed of?

[themisfit]

I'm ashamed of a lot of things about myself. A LOT

For example: living with my parents at 35, my self-harm scars, being addicted to pornography...

But, above all, I'm ashamed of never having had a relationship, never having had a girlfriend

This, together with its implications, is such a burden for me to carry, that it makes me want to die

It's not that I don't feel like I'm a man. I just don't feel like I'm a human being

What about you, folks: what are you ashamed of?

What are you so ashamed of, it makes you want not to wake up and look at people in the eyes?

 

[Tomorrow Is Today]

I'm ashamed of not being able to live on for people that want me to live.

I'm ashamed of benefitting from my family's resources - housing, food, treatment etc. when I know I am still going to CTB.

I'm ashamed of wasting my potential.

 

[thelostautistic]

I'm ashamed of a lot of things too. But overall I just feel ashamed about existing and taking up space in the world. I truly don't know why.

 

[raincandy_v]

I'm ashamed of being born. Ashamed of how I look, feel; everything. I wish most days I could vanish as if I had never existed.

 

[Quietist]

I'm ashamed of a lot of things about myself. A LOT

For example: living with my parents at 35, my self-harm scars, being addicted to pornography...

But, above all, I'm ashamed of never having had a relationship, never having had a girlfriend

This, together with its implications, is such a burden for me to carry, that it makes me want to die

It's not that I don't feel like I'm a man. I just don't feel like I'm a human being

What about you, folks: what are you ashamed of?

What are you so ashamed of, it makes you want not to wake up and look at people in the eyes?

Same boat. I'm ashamed of all of that and a lot worse.

 

[itsgone2]

I'm ashamed of everything I did the past 15 years. More mistakes than I can list.
I can only blame mental illness so much.
I'm surprised the regret hasn't killed me

 

[darksouls]

I am ashamed to be a human being,
I am indifferent to other people,
but it makes me not want to look myself in the eyes

 

[dragonofenvy]

I'm ashamed of a lot of things about myself. A LOT

For example: living with my parents at 35, my self-harm scars, being addicted to pornography...

But, above all, I'm ashamed of never having had a relationship, never having had a girlfriend

This, together with its implications, is such a burden for me to carry, that it makes me want to die

It's not that I don't feel like I'm a man. I just don't feel like I'm a human being

What about you, folks: what are you ashamed of?

What are you so ashamed of, it makes you want not to wake up and look at people in the eyes?

The exact same things, and knowing that most of it is my fault but I feel so powerless and useless to change.

 

[memo]

I'm ashamed of how much being sexually assaulted destroyed me

 

[iwkmsssb]

ashamed that i haven't accomplished anything in my life, ashamed of being a burden, ashamed of being a waste of space

 

[Mrs. T-800]

I'm ashamed of how much being sexually assaulted destroyed me

My biggest condolences to you. Surviving is not easy. Some days I ask myself if I am worthy of saying I am a survivor of it. It's not like an illness. But it does linger, and fester, and kill a part of you over time. It feels like a stain that cannot ever come out.
I stand with you in this.
Part of me is ashamed I didn't just say no or try to stop it.
Part of me is ashamed I let it eat at me and couldn't be stronger.
No-win game.

I'm ashamed of when my husband and I were dating and we broke up, I got with someone. It's not the same scenario as the assault, but I felt like I had no choice, I wanted some man to love me, so I put out. I still feel awful. I'll never get to undo that. I'll never be only my husband's.
It fucking kills me.

 

[Kokonoe]

my existence. i am so completely worthless. i've been worthless to everyone i've known, no matter what i've done. i've never been worth anything. i'm too useless to do anything right. i have no real value and my life is meaningless. i feel so much pain being reminded of my worthlessness every single day of my life. i feel completely subhuman. i feel alienated from everyone and everything because i feel so worthless and below everything that no one could understand what it's like to live life with inherent worthless you can't change.