Waking up early is killing me

[PROJECT: Extase]

Hi everyone,

There are many reasons why i want and am planning to ctb, but on that i haven't talked about yet is waning up early. For some reason, no matter how early or how much i sleep, if i wake up early in the morning I'll always be tired and depressed. I absolutely NEED to wake up late, and to take my time while doing it. I can hardly describe how i feel when i hear my alarm brutally interrupting my sleep, especially the very, very rare times i manage to remember my dreams, after spending most of the night trying to cope with my traumas to fall asleep. There are certain days where i am nothing but the shadow of myself, my body moving almost automatically, while my mind is still somewhere else, exhausted. And i still need to go studying or working and thinking about it almost physically hurts me. I've started to become panicked in the morning realizing how tired i was, and thinking about how i could look at least normal to others during the day. Its in those moments where i feel the need to ctb the most and, ironically, i think that the day i'll ctb, i'll do it in the morning so that i can at least reassure myself thinking i wont have to be tired anymore, that i am simply going back to sleep for a very long time. So yeah have a good night yall because i wont. ☆

 

[crestangel]

This is really relatable, I don't know what I'm doing wrong but I always feel tired and waking up early makes it so much worse. I hope you and Extase find your ideal conclusion.

 

[absolutelyyou]

This will obviously not fix your problems but I can really strongly relate to being basically triggered by alarms in the morning so I figured I'd drop this idea for you- I use the app loona for my alarm clock. It does a very soft and slowly increasing in volume alarm that rings with basically soft ethereal nature-y light music. While I still struggle getting up early the very very gentle alarm has helped lessen the feeling of panic and anxiety when I do.

 

[pasho25000]

i m very lucky in a way i do(nt have to wake up early i really like taking my time

 

[struggles_inc]

Unfortunately the world is built for "morning people". That is why people who have a hard time getting up early fall back. But there are jobs that don't require being awake at dawn.

 

[Tobacco]

I have two sleep disorders and I can't believe how unfair it is because it makes me see I'll never feel completely normal when I try to stick to a normal schedule. I have both delayed sleep phase disorder and also I need to sleep a lot due to poor sleep quality. There's something that has been happening lately and it's so annoying. It's winter but I remove my blanket in the middle of the night because my body heats up a lot.

 

[PROJECT: Extase]

Breaking news: i couldnt wake up this morning. I think I'll just give up on trying anymore. Preparing this weekend, Im planning to ctb Monday in the morning. I dont think ill be able to send a goodbye thread voilà voilà.