Waking moment

[GreenTree]

How long do you get from sleep until you realise your awake and get flooded with bad thoughts. Mine is about 5 seconds. I hate that moment of realization when when suicide, guilt, shame, panic set it. I really gotta try partial again. Just so scared of getting caught.

 

[Uber]

I don't immediately have an answer to your question, but what sort of thoughts are you dealing with?

 

[SamTam33]

On most days it's before I even open my eyes. Can't tell you how many times I've realized I was awake and tried to go back in time.

 

[Forever Sleep]

Yeah- similar- it's a matter of seconds for my consciousness to kind of 'switch on'. There's literally just a few blissful seconds when I just wake up before I realise that I'm me. I'm usually thinking about suicide within the first few minutes- after an initial panic about everything that I need to worry about and deal with.

 

[FuneralCry]

In my case it's always such a horrible feeling when I wake up and realise that I'm still here, it never takes me long at all to be aware of the fact that I'm sadly still trapped here. I understand your fears of failing ctb, to me the thought of such a thing is terrifying and I find it to be something so disgusting how people are denied options of risk free methods to free themselves from this hellish world. It's tragic how we cannot just choose to fall asleep and never wake again, the thought of such a thing sounds so incredibly ideal to me.

 

[Blahhh]

Instantly when I wake up the anxiety rushes in. Aaargh

 

[don't want it]

In my last days, he appears even in my dreams

 

[jane]

Right before, during, and about five seconds after I wake. My heart starts beating fast and I feel nauseous. I used to wake up w full blown panic attacks but it's not as bad anymore. Still real shitty to wake up every morning like that. I try to reflect on how I felt when I wake up compared to how I feel at the end of the day. Sometimes it's better, sometimes it worse or the same

 

[Float On Okay]

Oh yeah, that happens every time I wake up. So painful. Feels like the world is ending.

 

[outrider567]

Instantly depressed when I wake up, always