Update on journaling most mornings

[Final Escape]

I had started to journal awhile back daily or most days every morning for awhile at least a few pages in spiral notebook. I filled up 80 pages but now I'm scared to go back and read it because there's so much painful shit. I think it's necessary to see what the hell is going on inside me though. I'm scared I know how crazy my journaling often is and how intense, I'm afraid I'll throw myself into a flashback. Or be embarrassed at myself. There's lots of humiliating stuff too. I will do it when I'm in a very happy state so I'm not as likely to be derailed by the stuff I wrote.

 

[Jean4]

You can also see how far you came in some areas. I know that even though I am in a deep, dark pit of hell, there is some light.

No need to be embarrassed. Life is one big joke. Anything embarrassing you may have done is not as big as life.

Then come here and talk about what you want to get off your chest.

 

[Azzy69]

If it gets too much are you able to just skip the page?

 

[Final Escape]

You can also see how far you came in some areas. I know that even though I am in a deep, dark pit of hell, there is some light.

No need to be embarrassed. Life is one big joke. Anything embarrassing you may have done is not as big as life.

Then come here and talk about what you want to get off your chest.

Thanks Jean

If it gets too much are you able to just skip the page?

Good idea.

 

[TAW122]

Anything that can make you happy or feel less desolate and less suffering is good. Journaling is one such common way to relieve stress and get things off your mind.

 

[BPD Barbie]

I used to journal and then burn or just destroy the pages after as a way of destroying those feelings, emotions and memories.

 

[Final Escape]

I used to journal and then burn or just destroy the pages after as a way of destroying those feelings, emotions and memories.

That's normally what I do, but I need to know what I'm doing that I'm not conscious of where it might help me stop doing something. Or start doing something else so I'm suffering less. I want to see my patterns and triggers. I want to analyze and see if certain repeating shit comes up so I can be more mindful. I'm not sure what I'll find if anything but I'm sure there will be some revelations of my unconscious mind. When I journal it feels like I'm not fully aware of what I'm writing. I just sort of keep writing and whatever comes out just comes.