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ilvgore

ilvgore

alien
Jan 7, 2024
125
not that they are the whole reason for the suicidal thinking but just add some fuel to these thoughts
mine are: small boobs
and eye contact OMGAGAGGAFAFS i hate eye contact so muchπŸ˜­πŸ˜­πŸ˜­πŸ˜­πŸ˜­πŸ˜­πŸ’€
 
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deleteduser853695

deleteduser853695

I swear I tried my best
Feb 26, 2024
128
Chores , there is constant chores!
I cannot emphasize enough how much I agree. Taking the trash out and vacuuming and grocery shopping and doing laundry every week, showering and cooking and doing the dishes every day, mopping the floor, cleaning the bathrooms, combing my hair, brushing my teeth -- doing all this madness just to... repeat it all again for 5 decades until I die naturally?? No, I'd rather cut things off now.
 
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Dresired

Dresired

Member
Mar 24, 2023
11
not that they are the whole reason for the suicidal thinking but just add some fuel to these thoughts
mine are: small boobs
and eye contact OMGAGAGGAFAFS i hate eye contact so muchπŸ˜­πŸ˜­πŸ˜­πŸ˜­πŸ˜­πŸ˜­πŸ’€
TW: bad English/punctuation
Eye contact is so awkward omg, it feels like I'm being invaded and that I'm being intrusive at the same time!

But my personal stupid reason is that i missed a lot of gaming eras due to financials condition, like, i would love to play PVZGW2, overwatch, Elden Ring, etc, but I can't because games are too expensive in my country, but they looked sooo fun, it feels depressive to know I'll never gonna enjoy them, at least like i idealized

Another thing too, i wish i could play some stuff with my friends, but i couldn't because of my low end PC/cellphone, and i missed a lot of quality time with them...

Another reason is that teens/young adults suck nowadays, I'd kill to have a friend group in the 2000s that would hang out to an emo/punk/gothic/rock/whatever concert, just to fucking live, you know? People only care about looking good for social media
I cannot emphasize enough how much I agree. Taking the trash out and vacuuming and grocery shopping and doing laundry every week, showering and cooking and doing the dishes every day, mopping the floor, cleaning the bathrooms, combing my hair, brushing my teeth -- doing all this madness just to... repeat it all again for 5 decades until I die naturally?? No, I'd rather cut things off now.
To be honest, I'd rather be doing these chores at home than having to deal with a shitty boss at work, schedules, all that...

Problem is to find someone to bank me lmaoo
 
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TapeMachine

TapeMachine

perpetually confused
Jan 12, 2023
410
My main reason for wanting to commit suicide is that I've largely lost the ability to concentrate and reflect on a subject, something that from the outside will undoubtedly be seen as a pretty stupid reason to cease living.
Learning things was (still is) my deepest interest in life, the thing I care the most. Without it, I find no reasons to keep going (I enjoy other things, but it's not the same).
Similarly, I have lost the ability to retain/remember learned information, which renders one of my deepest interests in life (also learning) ineffectual..

So I definitely relate and understand why your similar struggles are of paramount concern to you, and I am so sorry that your mind is robbing you of something so valuable. My deteriorating mind undoubtedly plays a major role in my coveting of death.
 
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divinemistress36

divinemistress36

Angelic
Jan 1, 2024
4,332
I cannot emphasize enough how much I agree. Taking the trash out and vacuuming and grocery shopping and doing laundry every week, showering and cooking and doing the dishes every day, mopping the floor, cleaning the bathrooms, combing my hair, brushing my teeth -- doing all this madness just to... repeat it all again for 5 decades until I die naturally?? No, I'd rather cut things off now.
And doing all that while depressed is madness
 
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GuppyBoyo

GuppyBoyo

Member
Mar 6, 2025
61
i don't really have a "reason", i just do it because i want to
there are things i could consider "reasons", but i don't agree with the concept of having a reason, i am not forced to ctb by an external force that is a reason, it comes from me, it's the thing that i want and want to want
 
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IDCAAEBM

IDCAAEBM

Member
Aug 21, 2024
12
Chores , there is constant chores!
My mother thinks I enjoy doing yard work for the property I've been living at for the past few years. All it has done is proved to me I'm not willing to do something if I just have to do it all over the fuck again, over and over and over. Ignorant boomer enjoys being saddled with responsibility so much that she never recognized my aversion to literally everything in my life. I only stayed alive all these years to keep her from feeling the pain of my loss, now, I could care less. She never paid attention and now I'm all out of fucks.
 
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grapevoid

grapevoid

Mage
Jan 30, 2025
529
No joke got in my car one day a few months ago and the low tire gauge went off and I thought to myself "I have to stop and get air… or I could just CTB so I don't have to keep doing this stupid sh**"
 
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AgonizinglyAlive

AgonizinglyAlive

New Member
May 4, 2024
3
not that they are the whole reason for the suicidal thinking but just add some fuel to these thoughts
mine are: small boobs
and eye contact OMGAGAGGAFAFS i hate eye contact so muchπŸ˜­πŸ˜­πŸ˜­πŸ˜­πŸ˜­πŸ˜­πŸ’€
Thats so real, lol. It feels stupid, but body dysmorphia is really no joke. I feel so ugly and disproportionate and unlovable, whats the point honestly.

Feels so stupid when I really think about it though. Iv got other reasons though that make me feel slightly less unreasonable and dramatic that just compound onto everything.
 
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elkheart

elkheart

Member
Feb 8, 2025
21
Lol literally MONEY. It's the stupidest shit to take my own precious life because of a piece of paper that holds so much goddamn weight. So incredibly disturbing to me that if I had money I'd fuck around & find out for longer. All the things I'm curious about doing and exploring, even though right now I'm convinced there's no point, without having to worry about being a burden to absolutely anyone, just about being able to enjoy Earth for what it still is in beautiful places. Just getting to experience, having true freedom. I know technically "poverty" isn't a "stupid reason", but the concept that real sentient human beings like myself would end our lives because of cash? Fuck that lol I can't believe money rules my worth.
 
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lamy's sacred sleep

lamy's sacred sleep

Death is bliss
Nov 22, 2024
350
the fact i'm in a body.
there's always something, if you take a few seconds to focus on just the sensations your body experiences even in a relatively comfortable state it's so much
(you can feel your heart pumping, the pressure in your fingers, the aching in your elbow, the coldness in your extremities)
and of course it only gets worse as your conditions decline and i imagine with aging aswell

so much of life is distraction (in my experience) from living
 
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NoHalfMeasures

NoHalfMeasures

You either run from things, or you face them
Aug 20, 2024
73
Gender dysphoria, though I feel it's a step further than that. It's sex dysphoria, really. To me it feels like a very stupid reason for me to be suicidal.
I have a boyfriend and he's sees me as a guy, but no matter what, I can't see what he sees. He considers himself gay and often tells me he loves me and that he is gay for me (which I do find very sweet). But I can't even convince myself I am a man, let alone gay, because I don't have male genitalia. I can't believe I want to kill myself because I don't have a dick and balls but here we are. Haha. I almost want to laugh at the absurdity of it.

Other than the dysphoria, I am healthy, physically. I feel as though I should be grateful for my health, and I am.
 
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FakeProdigy

FakeProdigy

Can you feel my heart?
Apr 6, 2025
21
Would having bigger boobs make you feel better about life in general? What makes you feel so strongly about them?
 
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femcelloser

femcelloser

Transgender thing
Jan 18, 2025
132
Sometimes I'll get the feeling to kill myself because I hear a song and think it'd be really die while listening to said song lololl
 
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billie

billie

take me back to the night we met
Mar 31, 2024
623
my stupid reason is my bpd
 
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pixi

pixi

(formerly goredpet) buying time on minimum wage
Jan 11, 2025
84
to let people know i was being very serious when ive ever mentioned that i was struggling
 
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Thekla

Thekla

The Lord will take me home.
May 29, 2024
25
I'm incredibly unintelligent and it makes life harder than it needs to be. Everyone else in my family is a super-genius 130+ IQ except for me. Sad!
 
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Ferreter

Ferreter

Member
Apr 5, 2025
64
To be honest I can almost guarantee that no other member on here has the same reason I have to CTB, that's not a flex btw, my situation is awful, I just think I have almost no one to relate to in terms of what I'm currently going through. Should've gotten help when I was a kid, and not the kind of help that just meant having pills tossed at me.
 
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GlassMoon

GlassMoon

Once more, with feelings...
Nov 18, 2024
266
to let people know i was being very serious when ive ever mentioned that i was struggling
These thoughts also cross my mind often in CTB fantasies. How they would hear about it and then realize "what did I do" instead of listening to me when I tried to explain things. But sometimes I then allow myself to feel the hate, anger, frustration and helplessness. Then I cry and feel better, at least for a little while. And I try to use that anger to get what I need now.
 
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L

lonergirl_26

Member
Sep 1, 2024
60
My eating disorder and to prove to my family & bf that I wasn't being dramatic
 
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Lapdog6795

Lapdog6795

Member
Mar 24, 2025
24
I don't think any reason is stupid for ctb. It's your life and only you can decide which reason is sufficient to end it.
 
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IFrequentSaSu

IFrequentSaSu

Everyone dies one day.
Aug 26, 2024
12
My stupid reason is that I don't have a reason I just feel this way for some reason.
 
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jifscrater

jifscrater

Member
Apr 17, 2025
11
i hate isolation. But i am so far gone that i dont know how to act normal to gain friends.
 
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deepsweetdiver

deepsweetdiver

Member
Dec 10, 2024
41
AI. I have always wanted to work in the art field, but with all these new AI models coming out, its meaningless. People focus on the bad and cheap looking AI art, but they dont see the higher quality foolproof art. Animation wasn't just a hobby for me, it was my entire life, but what does it matter if I'll be replaced by a computer spitting out lines of code πŸ™ƒ
 
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failureofahuman

failureofahuman

Born failure, live failure, die failure
Nov 1, 2024
85
My memory is way worse than it used to be. This is a lesser known symptom of depression, but it's really noticeable to me. I think part of it is the anhedonia, where I don't remember things because all of it is the same and boring, but it's seriously impacted me to watch myself slowly lose my intelligence. I was "bright" as a kid, and probably complimented too much by parents and teachers on my intellect, to the point that it feels like a core part of my personality and something I really value. I have to correct grammar mistakes I inadvertently make more, I have to invest more energy into studying for school, I forget things sometimes seconds after they're told to me. It's terrifying.
 
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Emerita

Emerita

Cherish the Forsaken
Jan 16, 2025
48
honestly sometimes I just get so annoyed that I just take it as confirmation to ctb
 
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F

flakeyknight

Member
Jan 1, 2021
50
An embarrassing yearbook photo of me that might resurface besides the main reasons I have
 
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