Recovery Partners Megathread

[enviro400mmc]

Hey guys, I'm trying to force myself to make some kind of recovery because I keep on changing my mind on whether I want to CTB or not and am just looking for anyone to talk to. To an extent I just want friends who I can talk to enjoy spending time with. But for me it is particularly important that anyone I talk to is comfortable and willing to talk about deep subjects and difficult stuff and feelings, which you would kind of expect from anyone on SS anyway. In my life I do have family and friends (well sort of) and a therapist but I feel like I'm put under such pressure by them to act as if I'm normal and happy and recovered from previous mental health issues. I need people who I can tell 'yeah I kinda want to kill myself rn' and won't belittle me or be freaked out by me.

I'm 20 and would prefer people of vaguely similar age but beyond that I have little preferences beyond be a nice person.

 

[Ineedtodie]

32, male from north africa my english is good. Also french and arabic.
I ' m most certainly stuck between a rock and a crazy place.
I have a hope of opening a small coffeshop as my own sanctuary in an unforgiving, tribal, territorial society.
I ofen find the idea of ctb so relieving and soothing, making sens the most, seeing the horrible experiences and painful situations that I've been through and seemingly impossible to escape.
I' m torn like I said berween those two places, so anyone that can relate(hate to put an age limit on this which is over 30 because I know younger too has useful knowledge and experience and fun to interract with but just for the sake of being more relatable) feel free to Pm male or femal.
Maybe we will find common ground and help echothers through this lonely process of adapting and surviving/coping. Hope the cultural difference won't be a deterrent. Thank you.

 

[minato]

Call me Doppo or Tobi. I am 23m and I'm looking for someone to talk to. I am filled with dread for most things and making friends scares me. I usually don't try to socialize. I am highly paranoid because of my PTSD and schizoaffective disorder. I would prefer people my age or around it.

 

[Ultracheese]

18M, I'm looking for an older user than could perhaps be a mentor to me while I'm considering recovery. I'm interested in music, literature, philosophy, and film mostly. I'm admittedly not the best at carrying a conversation or replying promptly, and I can definitely be overly sensitive. But I like to think that I'm a good listener and can sometimes be helpful.

 

[Enabran255]

Lonely, outcast, left behind guy in life looking to try and get some friends. I've been through a rough time since college where my life went off the rails in a horrible way which inflicted me with deep trauma and damage. My immediate family treats me with a marked level of contempt and likes to low-key slander me to others, which works to reinforce my friendless situation. I live alone now but it's a meaningless, empty life devoid of any companionship. My efforts at making online friends always seem to fail in the long run. Usually I end up being too much for someone to handle because I'm lonely and can get clingy. My depression and suicidal feelings have also proven to drive former friends away eventually as there are bad days when I can't contain those feelings and end up disclosing them.

At this point in my life (43) I find it extremely difficult to find others I can open up to, relate to, and feel comfortable with. I've been NEET my entire adult life after it went horribly wrong in college, and have never even gotten to be in a romantic relationship. I try to meet new people, but what inevitably happens is there is simply too big a chasm between my and the other person's life experience. Everyone anywhere near my age is always married, well into raising kids, and has a long established career history. Even if they don't appear to judge me up front, over time I end up relegated to their scrap heap. I then find myself in the position of having to put in all the effort to keep anything going, and at that point I just feel pathetic and give up.

I would best get along with someone in a similar place in life: never married, no kids, no career (or at least no judgement against me for not having one).. basically someone who's not a "normie." Although I feel suicidal from time to time, I'm still around and hoping things can somehow improve despite everything looking hopeless, so I'd probably relate better to someone with a similar goal. It would be nice if we had some shared interests. I'm mostly into things like anime, some gaming (not as much in recent times but I'm not opposed to getting back into something if the right opportunity arose), programming, gamedev, and sometimes music if I'm in a better mood.

 

[godhelpme313]

Looking for a recovery partner. I'm 35 from USA, male, never married, live alone with cats. Want to help stay focused on living the life in front of me and I can do try to do that for somebody else too. Lone philosophy and yoga. Just PM about yourself and we can find a platform to talk on. Thanks!!

 

[Dune]

I've been really messed up since i was like 14 years old (im 28 now). I had met a woman who was in a similar situation as me (different mental illnesses tho). We got married and were together for 5 years. Was both the best and (now) the worst time of my life. The relationship collapsed because we were two broken people trying to make it work together. It's been made abundantly clear to me that another person cannot permanently fix all my problems

I definitely don't want to be lonely anymore in this world, and ultimately I will leave it if it comes down to that. But I'm going to give it one more year of intense effort (as much as I can muster) to try to get on my own two feet, and weld the broken pieces back together like a kintsugi bowl, so that it can hold shit again. Maybe then the need to find a partner will be a luxury, not a necessity..

So I have begun working out, eating right, sleeping right, going to therapy, addressing my distorted beliefs, meditating, medicating, affirmations, figuring all that helpful neuroscience stuff, trying find to joy in little things, and going out into the world again instead of isolating. It's been a few months already. I want to pile even more good habits onto this over time; working on basic surface level "self esteem" that I used to scoff at, all the way up to the real deal spiritual enlightenment stuff.

Honestly I feel like absolutely shit most of the time, like I'm drowning and losing my mind, often times don't have the energy to follow through. And I can't really lean on anyone in my life anymore either. Which is why I want to find an accountability partner that is as serious about attempting this as I am, and help eachother through 2023 atleast so we can say atleast we fucking tried.

If that resonates with you DM me and let's help eachother out

(Edit: already got a guy interested and I'll probably end up making a small discord server to congregate if we get a couple people)

 

[help56]

I need a friend . Someone one should has been hurt , broken hearted someone who has experienced heartbreak , loss

 

[Dune]

Update: we do have a recovery discord server now with a handful of people. It's channels are geared towards making small goals, and logging small habits to slowly build up momentum out of here, share resources, and support eachother when we're drowning. Aswell as just hanging out. Pm for a link if you think that would help you out

 

[Rapière]

18M, I'm looking for an older user than could perhaps be a mentor to me while I'm considering recovery. I'm interested in music, literature, philosophy, and film mostly. I'm admittedly not the best at carrying a conversation or replying promptly, and I can definitely be overly sensitive. But I like to think that I'm a good listener and can sometimes be helpful.

Curious- what makes you think this would be a good place to look for a mentor?

 

[Ultracheese]

Curious- what makes you think this would be a good place to look for a mentor?

God, this was so long ago. I guess I was probably just lonely. Pardon my indiscretion.

 

[Nuclear Gandhi]

25F, Eastern Europe. Returned to this forum struggling with my depression and suicidal tendencies after a break. Looking for a recovery/accountability partner, but open to venting and casual conversations as well.
My main issue is feeling like a rigid construct in a world of constant change. I want to change too, but lack discipline and will to do so. Would be great meet people in similar headspace that are willing to give themselves another chance. No pressure, no judgment, very small steps.

 

[asterisk3]

24/M

I feel a strong sense of duty towards recovery/rehab but the truth is I really feel like I've tried and tested almost every path I thought I could take to get better. What's left for me to try is healthy habitmaxxing like a normal person which I've already tried before and let it all get destroyed because it's hard to find joy and meaning in living your life alone when you're... alone for good. And with several difficulties/traumas stopping you from connecting better with others. I feel as if I'm in a cage of my own mind, and would like to interact with others who despite their odds are still fighting to regain their "sense of life" back. Or not. Just randomly talking could prove.. beneficial to the both of us.

Anyone's welcome. I just apologize in advance if I disappoint you in any capacity because I truly am goddamn bananas. Love chatting though.

 

[Jane Doe 13]

22 female/ US. Excuse my English, I'm originally from Asia.
I tend to lurk here bc I have nothing interesting to say anyway.
I'm struggling not to fail in college and desperate for a deeper connection right now.
I have depression, mild anxiety and ADHD. Recovered bulimic, self-harmer.
I like extreme metal, electro-industrial, gore, and learning digital art.
I'm a vegan antinatalist/ negative utilitarian.
Would prefer people older than me (gender doesn't matter). You're not welcome if you subscribe to conservatism, manosphere, and orthodox religions unless you want to make me more suicidal.

 

[MissedTheBusAgain]

39NB- VA, USA

I don't know yet if I'm here to recover, but I am open to it. Mostly I kinda want to find some friends, connections help keep me around. If you're a gamer or like alt-indie music we've got stuff in common already

 

[throwawayyy]

26M US looking for a recovery/accountability partner.

Main issues are anxiety/depression/ADHD.

Goal is to improve 1% every day, making improvements in sleep/diet/exercise/meditation/journaling/reading/studying/meetings/therapy( anything i can tolerate and is healthy) and improving my relationships with others and myself (focus on integrity/authenticity/honesty)

I have lost my support network recently so I am hopeful and want to keep an open mind

if you're in a similar position feel free to message me for mutual support/accountability. I don't care about gender, I do prefer someone 20-30.

 

[help56]

Any female in her 40s looking for a friend ? I am a female too . I am lost lonely , suffer with feelings of desieration and helpless . I used to be very analytical but these days I don't want to do anything

 

[Againstthewind]

I thought I would throw my hat in on this thread, been to hell and back and then a return trip, with mental and physical/chronic disabilities, drugs, alcohol, multiple suicide attempts, breakdowns, relationships (family and romantic), stupid decisions and choices. You name it. Changed mindset after a near death experience (not self inflicted). But the worse thing is not being listened too!

I am male, late twenties from the UK, my PM's always open for people who would like a chat or are maybe just lonely and just want to have some interaction, if your anxious on what your first message should be, just say hey! Doesn't matter what country or age you are, we could all use a friendly chat.

I hope I can provide some sort of support, whatever it may be, for the fine soldiers of this forum

Peace

 

[zi99]

Hey, I'm from Tajikistan, 26 y.o. female, having depression, apathy really disturbs me, but I try to handle it. Actually there are few people from Tajikistan, but if you're from another country at least we can talk by audiocall and videocall and support each other. I will pin my photo, because it will increase my chances to get acquainted with someone.

 

[AnxietyHangover]

25F, Eastern Europe. Returned to this forum struggling with my depression and suicidal tendencies after a break. Looking for a recovery/accountability partner, but open to venting and casual conversations as well.
My main issue is feeling like a rigid construct in a world of constant change. I want to change too, but lack discipline and will to do so. Would be great meet people in similar headspace that are willing to give themselves another chance. No pressure, no judgment, very small steps.

Hello, I am from eastern europe as well, and your age, I messaged you. Looking for new friends, as I feel terribly lonely. Thanks!

 

[deadlymongrel]

Mid 20s m looking to talk with anyone really. I've been having a hard time lately.

 

[body_snatcher]

22 female here. Looking for a recovery friend I can talk to and be honest with. I can't be completely real with the people in my day to day life, it's too risky. I relapsed recently into self harm so if someone happens to have good advice about finding motivation to quit I'd love to hear it. I'm a big music nerd as well and I love to talk about writing and movies. I have some light left in me, it would just be nice to talk to someone who understands how deep it goes

 

[AscendedBeing]

22m U.S. looking for a recovery/motivational partner to talk too from time to time. This would be strictly online but we can video chat from time to time if you'd like. Open to all ages genders etc.

 

[lili]

22m U.S. looking for a recovery/motivational partner to talk too from time to time. This would be strictly online but we can video chat from time to time if you'd like. Open to all ages genders etc.

Hey I would be down to talk if you'd like but I have no idea how to message you.

 

[AscendedBeing]

Hey I would be down to talk if you'd like but I have no idea how to message you.

I think I gotta wait for my account to be older or have more reactions first.

Hey I would be down to talk if you'd like but I have no idea how to message you.

I believe I have to interact more on here in order to have the message feature become an option for me because I don't see it either but once that's figured out I'll send you a message if I remember.

 

[Nillionaire]

18nb here
I guess I just feel really lost in life and I don't know how to move past what's happened the last couple years. it's really difficult to find anything to live for so I just pass the time until I can sleep again. I don't want to break my promises but I'm just so out of it all the time

 

[throwawayyy]

26 M accountability partner anyone?

 

[Remeer]

28 M
Hello, I don't really need anyone to write about what's happening to me, I come to this thread here to offer to chat with whoever needs it and give them my opinion about what they can tell me, basically I offer my help to you
greetings

 

[perlucidum]

19f. survived an attempt 48hr ago and I want to get better. horribly alone irl. looking for a recovery partner or a friend, any gender but preferably also a young age?

had depression since I was a kid, its the most fucking horrible illness and has put me in hospital multiple times so this stuff is not new to me. I have autism too but I have learned how to heavily mask it so I appear as "normal" to most people and barely anyone in my life knows.

im majoring in music at university, its my biggest passion, what I like to talk about most... honestly my only motivation for getting better at the moment is finishing my degree and then doing a masters degree. hopefully ill find other motivation eventually though.

I also like film and fashion and textilemaking and any other form of art. a lot of you in this thread seem lovely but I can't PM people yet. :(

 

[orca87]

36 M / Germany / Netherlands border

Last attempt to recover — currently lacking perspective

Backup Plan is CTB and knowing it's welk planned is a relief