departing
Enlightened
- Jul 5, 2019
- 1,502
Abuse is probably the #1 reason that lead me down the road to suicide.
xBrialesana
Become Dust With Me, My Love.
- Dec 17, 2019
- 552
Okay what the fuck, police. That's so fucky.
It's so sad that victims can't get help. It's actually sick. Blachsbf. When I was assaulted sexually I didn't involve the police but the clinic did and all they did was make everything worse and the fuckers that did that are walking.
I'm sorry for your suffering. :(
TimeTheTaleWereTold
lifeguard, save me from life
- Jan 30, 2020
- 44
i was groomed into an abusive violent relationship with a complete narcissist who was 22 at the beginning. i was 12. i only got out of it after i came to my own senses when i was 16. i'm almost 21 now and suffering from cptsd. the worst part? he thinks he didn't do a single thing wrong. :-/
NeverHungry
To eat or not to eat...
- Jan 30, 2020
- 72
Mental and emotional abuse for the first 15 years of my life. Everyone expects you to just keep on going as if nothing happened, "oh well it's been x amount of years since that happened...." bullshit. Sending my love to anyone and everyone here that has had to deal with any form of abuse, at any time, for any reason. You deserve better.
I'm sorry you're going through this. It's devastating when the other person has no sense of the damage they caused. Sadly I can relate too well. My fiance practically vanished on me without warning with our kids. The little bit we have talked she's blamed me for everything and hasn't offered an explanation. One day we're having a relationship, the next she's just gone.
TimeTheTaleWereTold
lifeguard, save me from life
- Jan 30, 2020
- 44
i'm so sorry that happened man. being deserted is traumatic enough let alone being abused too. my thoughts will be with you
i'm so sorry that happened man. being deserted is traumatic enough let alone being abused too. my thoughts will be with you
Thanks. I think her best line was "it's not like I just took off." Um...she slept on the couch one night before packing her stuff the next day and leaving. And the manipulation that followed...there's not enough room to even start explaining it. It's fucked me up beyond words.
Squiddy
Here Lies My Hopes And Dreams
- Sep 4, 2019
- 5,903
Previously I said I wouldn't write but I'll now because I thought I'm alone in this and whenever I write, others will avoid me.
My childhood was very strange because it was in unique circumstances and in very isolated place. I'll list the types of abuse that I got:
-Narcissistic and violent parents, also hurt me mentally and emotionally, so this is not only in childhood but continued. However, as a child it was way more severe and physical. I hated them but I was like a prisoner in that area. So what I get is shouting and violence and much more.
-Bullying at streets and roads and not elementary school (elementary school has different story). Violent and much emotional scars.
-Getting sexually abused by teachers routinely for my whole childhood, the school was almost all females and the staff all women and I was one of the few boys. So I kind of had special relationship with them, also I went to their places and slept there regularly, they give me food and let me play and pretend to love me so I loved them and let them do what they want and became submissive. Also I was escaping from home and bullies and other stuff. I don't know how to describe but they were doing mother stuff like giving baths and giving medicine, etc so being naked and molestation was regular but I thought it was ok and I was a dumb child and loved them. They spanked me bare butt and molested me regularly for the whole years before we moved. There are much more details but I don't forget those memories (as dissociated adult it turned to sexual memories). But as a child, I let them do whatever they want rather than the raw violence of home and bullying outside. I was dumb and fragile.
- Bullying at intermediate and high school (teenager time which was in a different country because we moved from that place after my childhood). This was also very physical and violent.
- Coincidentally, I got abused few times by women relatives sporadically and not regularly at childhood. I don't know why I don't forget those also. For example, one of my aunts scolded and spanked me. Other example, one teen relative wanted to "play". I've got complexity because of this generally but fortunately I got dissociated and mental illnesses and the enormous pain made the past like it never existed. But the memories remains sexually and I remember them clearly most of the time. But I don't remember the past and my memory is fading except those abuses and stuff I liked like gaming. However, those abuses turned to fetishes/kinks. I was only submissive to the teachers and some women. I was a different personality for other people like parents for example, I wasn't submissive for them at all and rebellious actually. I don't know if anyone would understand my complexity.
-Much more stuff in shitty life. Now I think about it, many toxic incidents happen but I try to not think about it.
-As an adult I had what many experienceed but for me it was more severe and I had multiple mental problems and illnesses (work, studying and relationships with women). The women for example abused me emotionally and then left or ignored me.
What I hate is how people are judgmental and will assume certain stuff (like you can't overcome because its a trauma) or (you are not a man). I don't know if someone will understand my complexity.
Well, that was long time ago and I'm aging. Mental illnesses problems now filling my mind alongside financial problems, philosophical and existential crisis.
My childhood was very strange because it was in unique circumstances and in very isolated place. I'll list the types of abuse that I got:
-Narcissistic and violent parents, also hurt me mentally and emotionally, so this is not only in childhood but continued. However, as a child it was way more severe and physical. I hated them but I was like a prisoner in that area. So what I get is shouting and violence and much more.
-Bullying at streets and roads and not elementary school (elementary school has different story). Violent and much emotional scars.
-Getting sexually abused by teachers routinely for my whole childhood, the school was almost all females and the staff all women and I was one of the few boys. So I kind of had special relationship with them, also I went to their places and slept there regularly, they give me food and let me play and pretend to love me so I loved them and let them do what they want and became submissive. Also I was escaping from home and bullies and other stuff. I don't know how to describe but they were doing mother stuff like giving baths and giving medicine, etc so being naked and molestation was regular but I thought it was ok and I was a dumb child and loved them. They spanked me bare butt and molested me regularly for the whole years before we moved. There are much more details but I don't forget those memories (as dissociated adult it turned to sexual memories). But as a child, I let them do whatever they want rather than the raw violence of home and bullying outside. I was dumb and fragile.
- Bullying at intermediate and high school (teenager time which was in a different country because we moved from that place after my childhood). This was also very physical and violent.
- Coincidentally, I got abused few times by women relatives sporadically and not regularly at childhood. I don't know why I don't forget those also. For example, one of my aunts scolded and spanked me. Other example, one teen relative wanted to "play". I've got complexity because of this generally but fortunately I got dissociated and mental illnesses and the enormous pain made the past like it never existed. But the memories remains sexually and I remember them clearly most of the time. But I don't remember the past and my memory is fading except those abuses and stuff I liked like gaming. However, those abuses turned to fetishes/kinks. I was only submissive to the teachers and some women. I was a different personality for other people like parents for example, I wasn't submissive for them at all and rebellious actually. I don't know if anyone would understand my complexity.
-Much more stuff in shitty life. Now I think about it, many toxic incidents happen but I try to not think about it.
-As an adult I had what many experienceed but for me it was more severe and I had multiple mental problems and illnesses (work, studying and relationships with women). The women for example abused me emotionally and then left or ignored me.
What I hate is how people are judgmental and will assume certain stuff (like you can't overcome because its a trauma) or (you are not a man). I don't know if someone will understand my complexity.
Well, that was long time ago and I'm aging. Mental illnesses problems now filling my mind alongside financial problems, philosophical and existential crisis.
Will never admit that i have ever been a victim, but my memorie problems and some recent events are really starting me to think that i might have experienced some abuse at some point. Every day is getting harder and harder for me to remember my whole life. It's like everyday i start all over again and have to deal with what it is.
NBreatheMe
Member
- Jun 30, 2019
- 22
I've been sexually abused many times, by family members and by a teacher. My mom, sister and grandma are narcissits, so they're emotionally abusive, always been, always will. My dad has asperger syndrome, so he got several issues to cope with feelings, somehow that leads him in being emotionally abusive sometimes too.
Most of my ex couples used to abuse me.
I heard abuse it's something that leaves a mark so deep you can't get ride off it and so obvious that other abusers can recognice it, so you're kind of damned. Once you're abused it will repeat again and again...
Most of my ex couples used to abuse me.
I heard abuse it's something that leaves a mark so deep you can't get ride off it and so obvious that other abusers can recognice it, so you're kind of damned. Once you're abused it will repeat again and again...
Despondent
Archangel
- Dec 20, 2019
- 6,777
Every single kind but the worst was narcissistic abuse by my mother. Complex predatory everything planned methodical over years and years...Out of anything, that is what has brought me to suicide. When I finally understood the fact it was intentional.
waterbottleman
Not a person
- Sep 30, 2019
- 721
No Im too universally disliked by people to even be abused. In order for people to abuse you, you have to catch their attention and be interesting to them to a certain extent.
im such a boring loser unattractive piece of shit that I'm a ghost to the world who nobody has ever cared to even pay attention to.
im such a boring loser unattractive piece of shit that I'm a ghost to the world who nobody has ever cared to even pay attention to.
