Venting My hebephilic ex admitted that he thinks 12-year-olds can consent. (CW)

[TheQ22]

No, no, NO. We are NOT doing this in my thread. Do NOT associate pedophilia with homosexuality. This thread has been flamed enough. Get out of here with that normalizing bullshit. I'm NOT doing this today.

That's not what I'm doing at all, so don't try putting words in my mouth. In fact you are rather proving my point., I was specifically commenting on MGs attempt to "understand" someone elses sexual thoughts and attractions.

I am saying that is how people think. What they see as being wrong today, may easily be seen as being okay tomorrow.

 

[demuic]

To get it off my chest and also justify disassociating with him.

Of course I have an emotional barrier. We're talking about a man who I love. Not only that, but a lot of these "attacks" feel more directed towards me than him, lol. I'm just amazed at the emotional immaturity a lot of people here have. I mean, I know it's a tough subject, but damn.

Wow.

 

[BerryCakes]

That's not what I'm doing at all, so don't try putting words in my mouth. In fact you are rather proving my point.

I am saying that is how people think. What they see as being wrong today, may easily be seen as being okay tomorrow.

I don't care what you're trying to prove. I'm not letting this thread get derailed even further than it already has. Keep those thoughts of yours to yourself.

 

[TheQ22]

I don't care what you're trying to prove. I'm not letting this thread get derailed even further than it already has. Keep those thoughts of yours to yourself.

No. It is a valid point whether you like it or not.

You started the discussion, I am contributing to it. You can't start a discussion, then complain that the answers can only match what you want to hear.

 

[BerryCakes]

No. It is a valid point whether you like it or not.

You started the discussion, I am contributing to it. You can't start a discussion, then complain that the answers can only match what you want to hear.

:/

Just because the original thread subject mentions pedophilia, that does not mean whether or not it'll be normalized in the future is necessarily a appropriate conversational transition to make. If you are being genuine, then I don't know what to say.

 

[TheQ22]

Then don't say anything. Problem solved. :)

 

[BerryCakes]

Wow.

I know I'm probably digging a hole for myself at this point by being needlessly defensive on a suicide forum, but I'm just going to come out with it, anyways.

Stop being passive-aggressive and say what you're thinking. Do it.

 

[Ghost2211]

To get it off my chest and also justify disassociating with him.

Of course I have an emotional barrier. We're talking about a man who I love. Not only that, but a lot of these "attacks" feel more directed towards me than him, lol. I'm just amazed at the emotional immaturity a lot of people here have. I mean, I know it's a tough subject, but damn.

Please don't mistake my tone since I'm typing. I'm only saying this for perspective. Try to look at it from both sides. If people feel his mindset and desires are inherently evil they may be triggered by you having willing and desired proximity to the source of evil. Many lives including mine have been destroyed by people keeping people that desire to harm children in their lives.

Even when they get mad hearing what they say is important because it is generally how society feels about people that sexualize children. I know this is a painful hard pill to swallow, but seeing all sides will help you.

 

[demuic]

I know I'm probably digging a hole for myself at this point by being needlessly defensive on a suicide forum, but I'm just going to come out with it, anyways.

Stop being passive-aggressive and say what you're thinking. Do it.

Everyone has already said what they're thinking, apparently that's just emotional immaturity.

He sounds like a real prize.



I'm sure he sees everyone that way.

No he thinks it's ok. He sees nothing wrong with it. That much is clear.

I hope this thread is a fake. It's disturbing in several ways. What is lovable about him? It sounds like you fell in love with the fake lies and fantasy he laid out to get you. And are still clinging to that fantasy. He manipulated you. To be a child molester is to be a very manipulative individual who says whatever it takes to get what he wants and he did that to you.

I don't know which is more odd, that he tells people of how he wants to have sex with young people, or how someone can hear this and be in love with him.

I also hope this is fake.

 

[Sinkinshyp]

To get it off my chest and also justify disassociating with him.

Of course I have an emotional barrier. We're talking about a man who I love. Not only that, but a lot of these "attacks" feel more directed towards me than him, lol. I'm just amazed at the emotional immaturity a lot of people here have. I mean, I know it's a tough subject, but damn.

How many years is the age difference between you 2?Here's my thing, he's openly telling you he thinks 12 yr old can consent to a grown man. Is he telling you this to make excuses why the break up? is it to feel you out to see if you stick around and accept it? if you accept it-which trying to stay with him is saying you're ok with it- will he next bring home children and think you will accept it as well. You said he has been on forums I imagine they shared inappropriate content. To get that content a child was abused. My mother was molested as a kid and it screwed her up- severely. You need to love yourself and realize you deserve someone better. He is dangerous I said it before. He is dangerous to kids- until he is open and honest with therapy even still he maybe for a while. He is dangerous to you- 1 you said he uses you for sex 2 soon he will have you as part of his molestation plan. He didn't admit he's attracted to 12 yr olds and they can consent just to say it. He is starting to groom you into his plan.

 

[BerryCakes]

Everyone has already said what they're thinking, apparently that's just emotional immaturity.

It's pretty immature to accuse someone of thought crimes they didn't commit, yes. I don't support pedophilia. I thought this was obvious, but apparently not.

It's all ridiculous at the end of the day.

How many years is the age difference between you 2?Here's my thing, he's openly telling you he thinks 12 yr old can consent to a grown man. Is he telling you this to make excuses why the break up? is it to feel you out to see if you stick around and accept it? if you accept it-which trying to stay with him is saying you're ok with it- will he next bring home children and think you will accept it as well. You said he has been on forums I imagine they shared inappropriate content. To get that content a child was abused. My mother was molested as a kid and it screwed her up- severely. You need to love yourself and realize you deserve someone better. He is dangerous I said it before. He is dangerous to kids- until he is open and honest with therapy even still he maybe for a while. He is dangerous to you- 1 you said he uses you for sex 2 soon he will have you as part of his molestation plan. He didn't admit he's attracted to 12 yr olds and they can consent just to say it. He is starting to groom you into his plan.

We have a six year age gap. (I'm of age, don't worry.)

His excuse for the break up isn't that, no. It was something he casually mentioned during conversation. As I said before, part of the reason why I made this post in the first place is because I feel that I'm the only one who'd prevent him from being able to make a "plan." I'm infertile and want to stay childless. I wouldn't want or allow him to be near kids. Most women want children, hence my worry. He has another ex. I'm not the only woman who he's messed around with. I doubt I'll be the last, either.

Thank you for the kind words.

 

[Deleted member 19654]

You may not support paedophilia but it will seem like you do if you continue to be associated with him. That's why it's best to just cut off all ties with him and move on.

 

[StellaArtoix]

Obvious content warning for mentions of CSA.

So, the whole reason I actually decided to join this forum on a whim after being a long time lurker is actually this. The truth is, I fell in love with this man some months ago. I knew from the beginning he was into young girls (primary around the ages of 14-17, but I suspect he's sometimes into younger than that). However, he told me he's non-offending and would never want to abuse a child in that way. I believed him, of course.

To shorten up the story, he ended up using me for sex. He said he'd take care of me and it never happened. Even after two months post break up, I was still in love with him.

I ended up having a conversation with him about two days ago. I was telling him about how I wouldn't mind dating someone with an intellectual disability, but only if they're still relatively "functional," so that I'm not taking advantage of them. He basically follows it up by saying that he feels even those severely impaired can sometimes consent... Then mentions that he thinks his 12-year-old self could consent to relations with an adult because he apparently was libidinous at that age. Needless to say, it freaked me the fuck out. I know it's pretty common for men to downplay CSA, but doing that while also being a self-admitted hebephile? What if he ends up meeting a young girl who's a nymphomaniac?

Needless to say, I had a string of panic attacks after that. I don't think it's a safe idea for him to be with other women. I'm infertile and very firm about remaining childless. Most women aren't like that. Most women want kids, and he's one of those "fence-sitters" who wants their significant other to make the decision to have kids or not for him. Needless to say, it's not very probable he'll meet another child-free woman. Just like how it isn't probable that he'll stay off a sex offender registry.

I don't know what to do. He doesn't want to be in a relationship with me, but it'd be better if he did, for his sake. I've tried working things out on multiple occasions, but he just sees me as a sex toy. This might sound insane, but I've even been considering using a love spell. I have no idea if it'll actually work, but... I'm just so scared.

OMG get the hell away from him.Yoi absolutely deserve better than that fucked up pedophile creep. Dont let his actions bring you down with him. Stay well clear of him. He doesnt respect you. Hes only using you. That wont change. Tell me where he is and I'll take care of him.

 

[BerryCakes]

Please don't mistake my tone since I'm typing. I'm only saying this for perspective. Try to look at it from both sides. If people feel his mindset and desires are inherently evil they may be triggered by you having willing and desired proximity to the source of evil. Many lives including mine have been destroyed by people keeping people that desire to harm children in their lives.

Even when they get mad hearing what they say is important because it is generally how society feels about people that sexualize children. I know this is a painful hard pill to swallow, but seeing all sides will help you.

All I can really say is that you're not wrong. I just never saw it like that. I saw thoughts as thoughts, actions as actions. I figured his fixation on it in the past was just that, in the past. I was sorely mistaken.

I only made this thread because I know that he won't be able to easily access a child with me around. I feel partially responsible for him, even if he wants nothing to do with me. I can understand the anger and resentment that people have due to trauma, but man, it just gets to me at a certain point. It feels like I'm not even being heard at times, which goes against the point of the thread. Then again, getting my fee fees hurt is obviously not as serious of an issue in comparison, so I guess I have nothing to whine about.

 

[Ghost2211]

All I can really say is that you're not wrong. I just never saw it like that. I saw thoughts as thoughts, actions as actions. I figured his fixation on it in the past was just that, in the past. I was sorely mistaken.

I only made this thread because I know that he won't be able to easily access a child with me around. I feel partially responsible for him, even if he wants nothing to do with me. I can understand the anger and resentment that people have due to trauma, but man, it just gets to me at a certain point. It feels like I'm not even being heard at times, which goes against the point of the thread. Then again, getting my fee fees hurt is obviously not as serious of an issue in comparison, so I guess I have nothing to whine about.

Well, that's why I'm talking to you in an honest and respectful way. I don't want to make you feel isolated or unheard. I can only go so far on the topic with you though since I can tell I can't get though to you with the concept that thoughts and actions are not black and white. There's a lot of progression in between the two, but you are trying. The other point I can see I can't get though is that you really don't and never will have control over this person. He's a grown man, and will do as he pleases.

 

[StellaArtoix]

All I can really say is that you're not wrong. I just never saw it like that. I saw thoughts as thoughts, actions as actions. I figured his fixation on it in the past was just that, in the past. I was sorely mistaken.

I only made this thread because I know that he won't be able to easily access a child with me around. I feel partially responsible for him, even if he wants nothing to do with me. I can understand the anger and resentment that people have due to trauma, but man, it just gets to me at a certain point. It feels like I'm not even being heard at times, which goes against the point of the thread. Then again, getting my fee fees hurt is obviously not as serious of an issue in comparison, so I guess I have nothing to whine about.

What do you mean you have nothing to whine about? YOU HAVE EVRY RIGHT. I was put in a pedophiles ring as a child. I KNOW FUCKING TRAUMA. HE DOESNT HAVE THAT MONOPOLY. LEAVE THAT FUCKER. You think or may believe you owe him something but at what price ? Your feelings? Your fucken sanity? Please dont do this to yourself.im here.well kinda. I'm hospital.jist shot myself in head.but pretty sure I'm thinking clearly about this.

 

[BerryCakes]

@Staff Can one of you lads PLEASE lock this thread. I'm sorry for the spam notifications, but my god. Please let it end.

 

[Aap]

Oh no, I asked for peoples thoughts and got what I asked for. How dare this not be an echo chamber.

last time. You CANNOT keep him from acting, anymore than a spouse can keep a partner from cheating

 

[TheQ22]

Oh no, I asked for peoples thoughts and got what I asked for. How dare this not be an echo chamber.

I was pondering posting something similar but I've probably caused enough offence already by not saying the right thing.

 

[BerryCakes]

Oh no, I asked for peoples thoughts and got what I asked for. How dare this not be an echo chamber.

I really hate intellectual dishonesty. Do that somewhere else. You know exactly where I'm coming from.

 

[Aap]

I dislike pedophiles and those that make excuses for them. I'm sorry you feel the need to attack me

 

[BerryCakes]

I dislike pedophiles and those that make excuses for them. I'm sorry you feel the need to attack me

Then stop circlejerking with someone who made the comparison between pedophilia and homosexuality, lol. This is so stupid.

 

[Aap]

Go back and show me where I made that claim. Talk about intellectual dishonesty....

 

[TheQ22]

Then stop circlejerking with someone who made the comparison between pedophilia and homosexuality, lol. This is so stupid.

I didn't do that, I was talking about people and the irrational way they think - like, erm, well...

 

[BerryCakes]

Go back and show me where I made that claim. Talk about intellectual dishonesty....

Did you not read my post, lad? I said you were circlejerking WITH someone who made that claim. Get out of here.

 

[TheQ22]

Did you not read my post, lad? I said you were circlejerking WITH someone who made that claim. Get out of here.

And again, I was talking about how people once viewed homosexuality, and how pedophilia might be viewed in the future, and was answering a comment by another poster, I was NOT comparing homosexuality with pedophilia, so you can stop the lying and emotionally manipulative inferences.

 

[BerryCakes]

And again, I was talking about how people once viewed homosexuality, and how pedophilia might be viewed in the future, and was answering a comment by another poster, I was NOT comparing homosexuality with pedophilia, so you can stop the lying and emotionally manipulative inferences.

>about how people once viewed homosexuality
>how pedophilia might be viewed in the future
>this isn't a comparison, apparently, don't worry about it

Stop.

 

[TheQ22]

>about how people once viewed homosexuality
>how pedophilia might be viewed in the future
>this isn't a comparison, apparently, don't worry about it

Stop.

Get off your virtue signalling soap box.

YOU start a post about YOUR OH who is a pedo, then moan when you don't hear the answers you want.

If anyone here has a right to be miffed off, it's everyone but you.

 

[GoneGoneGone]

>about how people once viewed homosexuality
>how pedophilia might be viewed in the future
>this isn't a comparison, apparently, don't worry about it

Stop.

It's a comparison about the process, not about the content. Not taking any sides!!

 

[BerryCakes]

Get off your virtue signalling soap box.

YOU start a post about YOUR OH who is a pedo, then moan when you don't hear the answers you want.

If anyone here has a right to be miffed off, it's everyone but you.

Based moron. Never change.

It's a comparison about the process, not about the content. Not taking any sides!!

A comparison is still a comparison. I know he likely doesn't view pedophilia and homosexuality as one in the same, but I REALLY didn't want that subject to even come up in the first place. Pedos like to talk about that sort of thing all the time to defend their paraphilia. It's just not... good tact.