To answer your question it just took a hell lot of thinking. I was originally thinking about the doorknob method with full suspension but I wasn't sure if that would work with my shitty door handles. Since I was so set on using my door as an anchor point since there are no other available ones in my home, I figured I'd need something to be able to tie my rope to so it won't slip through the door frame, so that's how I came up with that idea.
However…I've realised the flaw with my original plan. Since I would be using a static rope that means it would be pretty stiff. The problem with that is that I don't think the door would be able pinch the rope and close. I definitely can't use a softer, semi static or dynamic rope as a solution because then my feet would surely touch the floor as the noose drops, and I'm not aiming for partial.
So I was thinking, could I use a bedsheet instead? One that doesn't stretch. I'd just be tying a secure stopper knot on the other side of the door instead. I'm not too sure about this honestly because I've heard it delays the time to reach unconsciousness and it may not compress the carotids enough.
My only other option would be to muster up the courage and to do it outside with the rope. Find a suitable wooded area. Problem with this though is that I'm not able to do it at night when it's dark and quiet outside. (For some context I live with my very paranoid father, it's quite impossible for me to sneak out of my apartment without alerting him and making him suspicious of me due to my past history of attempts.) So if I do this it'll have to be around 9am after he leaves for work. I live in a busy area so all I can do is just pray I don't get found too early. I hope me carrying a stepstool in public won't seem too suspicious..
Sorry for dumping this out on here I suppose. Any thoughts..? I really could use some opinions.
Couldn't you use other doors in the house? Also, you think the door(s) won't be able to pinch the rope and close, but do you know that for sure?
You're right in thinking that with a bedsheet it would take you longer to reach unconsciousness.
I have a similar situation where I live with people that wouldn't like it if I sneak out at night. My idea is just to do it anyway, just sort of YOLO it when I've fully decided it's time to die.
Doing this during day time might be risky... you don't wanna risk brain damage.
So yeah, if I were you (and I am in a similar situation) I would scout out your surroundings for a suitable spot to hang myself, make sure I got everything in order, and then just sneak out and do it at night.
It shouldn't matter if your dad gets upset, since you won't see him again. Researching and planning things well will make you feel less anxious about it.
Or wait, I just remembered: if it is literally impossible for you to exit the house at night, do it during the day. Hide somewhere outside. And at night you can carry out your plan.
I mean, that's how I will do it when my time comes. It's all very drastic, but if you do this when you're prepared, you can succeed. Give it some time, there's no rush. Plan things thoroughly.
I wish you all the best