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morgueprincess

morgueprincess

ghost
Dec 26, 2023
24
i don't know how i can put my family through finding me in my room the morning after, and continuing to live in the same house that i ctb'ed in. but i also know that i cannot stay here in this world and i have to find a way out. my mom and i are really close and she's disclosed before that my illness was adding on to her depression because she hates to see me sad, or in pain, and i don't know how she'll handle it when i'm gone. i feel so guilty for the pain i'll inflict on my family, but i have to make it out of here.
 
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dhaak

dhaak

Member
Dec 25, 2023
12
Personally I consider the fact that it'll hurt my relatives for a period of time, but eventually they'll get over it and move on. Such is the psyche of humans, surprisingly adaptive. They'll give it a place and might even understand it. We can't be sure about this of course, but in the end it's our body and life, and our choice. I hate being guilt tripped in staying or people saying it egotistical or selfish.

In my opinion it's egotistical to not want somebody else to CTB, just so you don't hurt.

When I CTB, and on my previous attempts, I've left notes on my door shortly stating what I have done and what they'll stumble across. At that point, it becomes their choice to enter the room and see me.

Just my two cents. I really hope you find the peace you're looking for.
 
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morgueprincess

morgueprincess

ghost
Dec 26, 2023
24
Personally I consider the fact that it'll hurt my relatives for a period of time, but eventually they'll get over it and move on. Such is the psyche of humans, surprisingly adaptive. They'll give it a place and might even understand it. We can't be sure about this of course, but in the end it's our body and life, and our choice. I hate being guilt tripped in staying or people saying it egotistical or selfish.

In my opinion it's egotistical to not want somebody else to CTB, just so you don't hurt.

When I CTB, and on my previous attempts, I've left notes on my door shortly stating what I have done and what they'll stumble across. At that point, it becomes their choice to enter the room and see me.

Just my two cents. I really hope you find the peace you're looking for.
thank you so much, i hope you find peace as well
 
FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
47,835
I hope that you find freedom from your suffering, best wishes.
 
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