Venting Darkest secret

[noonetoo]

I have never wanted anyone I know dead or to torture / physically hurt them. Only exception is when I read about pedophiles or child killers. I hope they're all burnt alive to be honest. Sometimes I wonder if there's any pedophiles on here... because if I was one I would do the world a favour and CTB


I don't know what my deepest secret is. Probably my suicide plan. Or about lying. I will lie to people if I'm scared I'm going to lose them or to make them like me. Ive carried out some huge lies to keep people in my life. Never worked though. They just never found out so I keep doing it.

Omg, yes!!!!!!!!!!!

My BF and I have discussed thoughts wishing we could on a rampage down the sex offender list if we gave up on life together, but we don't have the necessary skills to go about . The law doesn't do enough to keep children safe.
And I hope if there's any here, they keep it in the closet where it belongs. And yeah they should do the world a favor...
Not a dark secret, just dark thoughts.

 

[Jodes]

What is wrong with you guys.
Is it true about the moderation? That this what counts as "pro choice" now???

 

[Meretlein]

What is wrong with you guys.
Is it true about the moderation? That this what counts as "pro choice" now???

Well you are in the thread for darkest secrets on a suicide forum.

 

[Jodes]

Well you are in the thread for darkest secrets on a suicide forum.

I thought rules might override that lmFAO. Nevermind the fucking pedo cunts. If those comments could be considered jokes or not, what does it say?

 

[Meretlein]

I thought rules might override that lmFAO. Nevermind the fucking pedo cunts. If those comments could be considered jokes or not, what does it say?

There are pedophiles posting here? I think a lot of these posts are serious, you can never be sure though.

 

[aneurysm]

What is wrong with you guys.
Is it true about the moderation? That this what counts as "pro choice" now???

I think there a difference between fantasizing about thing and actually wanting to do them in real life. I think it's okay to have inappropriate fantasies (we are animals anyways, it's gonna happen regardless of anybody's opinion)

It only gets problematic when the conscious awareness part of you think these pulsions of yours are intelligents or make sense, and therefore you'd want to act on them.

 

[Glim]

If there was a button to erase all life, I'd press it.

Thanos was a half-assed omnicidal mass murderer.

 

[Jodes]

If there was a button to erase all life, I'd press it.

Thanos was a half-assed omnicidal mass murderer.

I could read this stuff for hours

 

[Redt2go]

Omg, yes!!!!!!!!!!!

My BF and I have discussed thoughts wishing we could on a rampage down the sex offender list if we gave up on life together, but we don't have the necessary skills to go about . The law doesn't do enough to keep children safe.
And I hope if there's any here, they keep it in the closet where it belongs. And yeah they should do the world a favor...
Not a dark secret, just dark thoughts.

Sorry to be that "not all" person but a lot of people get on the registry for public indecency like peeing in public or like car sex or streaking lol I totally get where you're coming from though... I just felt like this is something people might actually do

 

[Jodes]

I just felt like this is something people might actually do

Given the topics, I'm not sure what this statement would clarify

 

[Redt2go]

Given the topics, I'm not sure what this statement would clarify

I was specifically referring to the post I quoted .... This statement clarifies that if you want to kill everyone on a sex offender list because you think they all raped people or kids you'd be killing some innocent people and likely some poor people if they felt the need to pee outside...

 

[Glim]

Omg, yes!!!!!!!!!!!

My BF and I have discussed thoughts wishing we could on a rampage down the sex offender list if we gave up on life together, but we don't have the necessary skills to go about . The law doesn't do enough to keep children safe.
And I hope if there's any here, they keep it in the closet where it belongs. And yeah they should do the world a favor...
Not a dark secret, just dark thoughts.

Kidnap them and throw them in a den of tigers at the zoo?
"You like molesting a 5 yr old? Try that on tigers, which are full grown by that age"

 

[noonetoo]

Sorry to be that "not all" person but a lot of people get on the registry for public indecency like peeing in public or like car sex or streaking lol I totally get where you're coming from though... I just felt like this is something people might actually do

Had a feeling someone was going to mention that. However maegan's law lists the charges against the offender. It would be easy to distinguish one who raped kids from one who urinated in public drunk.
@Jodes not understanding why you're bothered? A lot of people posted admitting homicide was their fantasy. I was just really agreeing with @Thoughtforms ... unless you felt we're "encouraging" to ctb but that would depend where your morals lie...& I said do the world a "favor" but did I specify? Not exactly. : /

 

[Jodes]

Actuall

Had a feeling someone was going to mention that. However maegan's law lists the charges against the offender. It would be easy to distinguish one who raped kids from one who urinated in public drunk.
@Jodes not understanding why you're bothered? I was just really agreeing with @Thoughtforms ... unless you felt we're "encouraging" to ctb but that would depend where your morals lie...

Sorry - you know what, I have real issues and there's a reason I hide away and this site is my only source of social contact. I think you guys know that and I'm grateful for the huge tolerance everyone shows me.

I hope @Thoughtforms is OK? And ..., @MsM3talGamer I think will have passed away or CTB, my thoughts are with her.

 

[noonetoo]

Actuall
Sorry - you know what, I have real issues and there's a reason I hide away and this site is my only source of social contact. I think you guys know that and I'm grateful for the huge tolerance everyone shows me.

I hope @Thoughtforms is OK? And ..., @MsM3talGamer I think will have passed away or CTB, my thoughts are with her.

I'm still not understanding why you targeted my post when I was just agreeing.

Because I quoted someone who may have died already? I had no idea. : (

 

[Roberto]

I was specifically referring to the post I quoted .... This statement clarifies that if you want to kill everyone on a sex offender list because you think they all raped people or kids you'd be killing some innocent people and likely some poor people if they felt the need to pee outside...

I forgive my father for the abuse. I don't think is the main reason of my depression. It is just all. I feel sad, but he did also good things and I have to thanks for that. I also want to forget what happened.

 

[Never Free]

Very few people reveal their darkest thoughts, I have worse ones than being homicidal, if that's possible.

I feel people in a way find suicide "worse than" homicide. I think part of that is society can step in reasonably, and stop homicide. It's obviously violating another's rights( for arguments sake leave out "assisted suicide"). So society needs to do mental gymnastics in a way to justify preventing suicide.

 

[AhG]

Uh, pretty horrible and sick, so I'll keep that to myself.

 

[WhiteRabbit]

I fantasize about killing myself in front of my pain management doctor.

 

[Roberto]

I said I didn't know if I loved my girlfriend after she told me she was pregnant when I was 23 or so. She decided to abort.

 

[WhiteRabbit]

I said I didn't know if I loved my girlfriend after she told me she was pregnant when I was 23 or so. She decided to abort.

I think in that situation honesty is best.

 

[Roberto]

I think in that situation honesty is best.

I was so scared of the situation. I reacted cowardly.

 

[WhiteRabbit]

I was so scared of the situation. I reacted cowardly.

If you didn't want to raise a child, and she didn't want to raise one alone, maybe it was for the best? I'm sorry you feel guilty about it. I'm sure it's hard.

 

[Roberto]

If you didn't want to raise a child, and she didn't want to raise one alone, maybe it was for the best? I'm sorry you feel guilty about it. I'm sure it's hard.

I feel guilty for my girlfriend, because I didn't support her when she needed most. Now I woudn't do it. Well I can't imagine myself as a father. I would be a horrible father. That days I didn't know myself enough.

 

[BorderlineMistake]

"I don't know what my deepest secret is. Probably my suicide plan. Or about lying. I will lie to people if I'm scared I'm going to lose them or to make them like me. Ive carried out some huge lies to keep people in my life. Never worked though. They just never found out so I keep doing it."

I know this is incredibly late but I did this. I lied about being sick for 6 months because a woman who had been grooming me from the time I was 9 threatened to leave. I thought she was my mother. I ended up attempting suicide by scalpel (impulsive and dumb but it was a terrifying moment and all logic went out the window) and I came clean because I couldn't take it any longer. My face was plastered all over the news and my life was practically ruined at 18 years old — national & international news stations picked up my story. I still live in constant fear and yet it was all simply because I wanted someone to love me. Selfish.

 

[freefrommybody]

My rage never seems to go away. My mental state seems to have declined further, and I hardly noticed while it was happening. I know this has been a long time coming, and there's likely more to come, but I surprised myself a bit when I broke down crying just from the sound of someone talking outside my room, and with the risen viciousness with which I've beaten myself.

I'm still in control and I can stop when I need to, but my automatic responses have changed. I don't trust myself as much as I used to, and I worry about what I'll be like in the future.

There are worse things about me, but until the day when it comes out and I'm no longer here to worry, I want to maintain my dignity in the public eye.

 

[BabyYoda]

It's none other than wanting to kill myself and being serious about it. My previous dark "secrets" such as my sexual preferences are no longer secrets when it was safe telling to my friends.

 

[TheDevilsAngel]

I have very very dark thoughts... Sometimes I don't even know how I can think such thoughts and have such urges.... Its like one day I think about murdering someone and the next I think about how I can hurt myself.. Its my secret how much I desire to physically hurt myself and how much satisfaction I get from doing so.... I've never hurt another person so I out them thoughts down to the 'dark' side of my mind there more fantasies than anything

 

[Moonicide]

When I was really young and being abused, I started abusing my animals too. I wanted them to hurt like I did. When they would fight back and hurt me, I also enjoyed that. It was even better when they made me bleed... It was a form of self harm in a way. One time I choked my pet so hard it almost died in my hands, but I stopped, realized what I had done, held them and cried. They started breathing again and ever since then I stopped doing such terrible things to animals... The worst part is that even though I did almost kill them, they still loved me. They still felt safe in my arms, they still cried for me when I left them alone for too long, how fucked up is that? To have an animal love you so much despite the fact you almost choked them to death. They were able to see the good in me that I couldn't see... I know in the end it wasn't entirely my fault given the fact I was so young and dealing with such heavy things. But I was so fucked up for doing that. It's taking everything in me to not cry. I feel like a monster even now... I've learned from it and have never done anything so terrible and vile since then, but how could you not feel like a monster?

 

[MysticPerception]

When I was really young and being abused, I started abusing my animals too.

It's okay at least you aren't alone there. I wasn't even abused by my family but I still abused my two cats like crazy when I was younger. I would do stuff to them that should have killed them but some how they survived. I even gave my cat a horrible trauma and fear of bags for over 10 years because I put him in a bag and swung him around in circles around the room. The fucked up part is that after so many years of abuse I grew up realizing what I had done was completely wrong and showered them both in love. The one I put in the bag is still with me now. He's always been here for me and he seemingly can't live without me. I still can't believe he forgave me for everything horrible I did to him.