Chronic Illnesses and Physical Diseases Megathread

[NappinHappening]

Im perfectly healthy (physical wise) except for cluster-headache.

But since 7 years back i was diagnosed with schizo. And since then i feel like i was cut off from normal life and normal society.
I got government flat rented (which anyone wouldnt agree to live in if it wasnt so cheap)
, i got government money monthly and tonnes of discrimination ,prejudice and stigmatization.
Most ironic case was when i set my flat on fire thanks to being delibareted after long period of time in which i didnt have anyone to talk to.
Year after incident i was prosecuted as a danger to the society by the judge , after being stabilizied with no space to explain myself and being labeled as total lunatic who gets high (i was sober for year from everything) which all steamed feom 5 years (and more) old doctors writing and inpatient facilieties.
The biggest fail is that the medications i was ordered to take by judge every month by injection from my dr causes me to be extremely depressed which only enforced my will to kms after realizin this society is totally pathetic to take care of anyone other then normal cis ehite hetero men and or cis white women eith perfect health.

This society is a joke.

 

[reborn87]

I have so many chronic illnesses am 36 and bedridden. Hard to type or hold phone. I want to do the dying with dignity in Switzerland but it's hard for ppl in USA for dr to write and I can't fly :(

I wonder with all meds how can I do it myself. I have @mitriptyline. Pls feel free to dm me. I want to be out of this sufferring prison.
It's living torture for me. Hard to get up to go to bathroom. Eating and showering so hard. Anyone know if u can buy SN online on Amazon if it works to end this living nightmare?

Does charcoal work if so which kind to take and how much?

Also can I succeed w @mitryptaline od?

Is there anti nausea otc recommended so I don't vomit ? Tysm. Feel free to dm me

 

[reborn87]

I'm in so much pain physically I wish to end this painlessly it's torture

 

[HD72]

I'm in so much pain physically I wish to end this painlessly it's torture

I am in the same place but please be careful with taking psych meds. U risk an illness called akathisia or tardive dyskinesia. It is not worth it. I do not know what I am going to do. Someone promised to get me a gun but lied to me. She's part of the reason I'm sick. I am trapped in this painful skin and she is fine. All I can do is look at her and wonder why God hates me so much.please feel free to DM me if u need to share.

 

[reborn87]

I am in the same place but please be careful with taking psych meds. U risk an illness called akathisia or tardive dyskinesia. It is not worth it. I do not know what I am going to do. Someone promised to get me a gun but lied to me. She's part of the reason I'm sick. I am trapped in this painful skin and she is fine. All I can do is look at her and wonder why God hates me so much.please feel free to DM me if u need to share.

Can u dm me. I'm new here. Don't know how to

 

[HD72]

I have those brain fog symptoms. I find myself staring at a TV programme for hours or looking at something I might watch scrolling Endless then realise what I'm doing and the daze I've been in. It's horrible. You sound like you have POTS. This is one of my issues. Problems with the autonomic nervous system, flow of blood upwards against gravity.

Hey HD. How old are you can I ask? I hope you aren't young. It's even more cruel when someone is young and suffering in pain.

I don't believe in God or anything like that so hope you can see none of this is punishment. It really is just a mixture of bad luck, bad genetics, unfortunate circumstances all mashed together to create a horrible situation

Yes you are totally right. Sorry if that sounded insensitive. I'm in my mid 40s and although my issue started about 10 years ago, I still feel robbed of a life

I'm really sorry anyone has to feel pain. I am especially sorry for the people on here. I'm currently watching my mom who didn't get me care when I was younger sleep peacefully while I sit here in agony. Gonna have to go to the hospital where they treat me abusively because I'm mentally ill look different and have pain. If u have pain u must be drug seeking? I've never even had a drink of alcohol and the first thing they do is drug test me. They don't treat me but they tell me I'm nervous and invite me to meditation classes. I fucking hate nurses and doctors,

 

[peacefulexit]

I suffer from Peyronie's Disease, and will be hanging myself to find relief.

 

[HD72]

I suffer from Peyronie's Disease, and will be hanging myself to find relief.

Are you unable to afford treatment or is it too bad. I hate to see someone in pain. I am so very sorry. Truly.

I have ulcerative colitis (since 1992), ankolysing spondylitis, long covid for 3 years, asthma, cptsd, nafld, sleep apnea, urinary incontinence (thx to having twins 15 years ago), extensive nerve damage to pelvic region. I'm so very tired of constant pain that worsens at night and extreme fatigue and a fucked up head. I'm exhausted but pain keeps me up for hours. My head doesn't shut up and I'm miserable. Actually I've given up. I stopped caring yesterday. Just waiting for the helium to arrive on Wednesday. Until then status quo so no one realises. Not that anyone would. My twins have autism so they live in their own worlds. I divorced my abuse husband of 23 years about 5 years ago. No family on this side of the world. I've lost all my friends due to illness and the inability to leave the house due to long covid - I slept 20 hours a day for the first year. I could barely function when I was awake. I'm a bit better now - only sleeping 10-12 hours a day. I can cook and keep the laundry going and the house tidied. But not able to work (was a primary school teacher). My kids had to move in with the abusive ex husband. When he was arrested a year ago they moved back in with me. I'm barely coping with life. Im in therapy but that's really hard work and I'm tired of everything. I can't see my reality changing. Ever.

I am so so sorry. Truly. If u want a friend please DM me. May I ask how did u get the gas delivered to your home. Are u in the U.S.?

 

[murderatruemorgue]

I've had chronic pain for years now. It has been getting worse.

The absolute most terrifying thing though started in the past 6 months. My brain is so utterly messed up. I have a Chiari Malformation and I've struggled to get care. Unless they're a Chiari specialist, neurologist know next to nothing about them.

Over a week and a half in November I was in and out of the ER. I would go into a complicated migraine/status migraines where I my whole body would spasm (looked like a seizure but wasn't,) slurred speech/only get out a word or two/or unable to speak at all, I wouldn't be able to walk because my whole body was shaking, my eyes would track back and forth in the room... for a 10 minute period I was paralysed. They would give me a migraine cocktail, the symptoms would lessen, and in twelve hours I would be back.

I spent a month and a half lying in complete darkness because sitting up, standing, or having any light would set me off. The acute spams have lessened but I still get body jerks and brain 'jolts.'

Doctors kept saying 'anxiety,' yet the MRI says differently. It's been a battle to even get to a neurosurgeon who specializes in Chiari.

I've felt trapped in my body for years, but losing my brain? My cognition? If it keeps getting worse... I don't want to be trapped in my mind like that again.

 

[findmybridgesocal]

I was always a serious athlete, even just a few years ago. Now I can no longer walk, can barely talk, and my whole body hurts. The worst part - I keep getting worse and declining with no prospect for improvement. If I don't figure out how to ctb soon despite my disability I'm going to die an excruciating death, likely starvation after I'm in so much pain and limited mobility I can't eat (and refuse a feeding tube)

 

[ewlife]

Ok I get quite frustrated by this. If someone is physically losing sensory nerves through their body, entire face and head because of a physiological.disease process, is the above going to help me think my way out of it. The problem with this type of theorising is it stops clinicians searching for true causes and appropriate treatment. There may be none but it puts it back in the poor suffering patient and their brain wiring or trauma responses. It is dangerous and gaslighting at its finest.
I chose to ignore all this nonsense and figured out the diseases I had myself. Physiological testing then demonstrated this was what I had. Most young people don't have the energy or resource to fight like this. These articles I find very unhelpful

Respectfully, you don't speak for everyone. I'm interested both in getting a cure for my condition AND finding ways to cope in the meantime. While I hear what you're saying about lazy clinicians, posting the resource here is an entirely different context.

 

[persimmon]

I have been mostly housebound and bedbound for 6 months with arthritic problems that specialists don't fully understand. Hips are the big problem but hands are getting worse – weaker and more painful. Can't get arthritis drugs as the inflammation is not active but the pain (and associated isolation and quality-of-life) is unbearable. Laffs are thin on the ground, I can tell you.

 

[AlternativeBagel]

While it's not the worst thing in the world, it's diabetes. I was diagnosed with type 2 at a pretty young age. It honestly doesn't have much if anything to do with why I want to ctb, but having it does significantly reduce my quality of life and my lifespan. Not to mention it can lead to other things like getting amputated. There's just no way that I'm willing to ever deal with that.

 

[Dot]

 

[littleearthquakes]

Did a thread on this too but am definitely in this situation of severe chronic pain, illness, and disability making my life unbearable. I can't do pretty much anything I enjoy, even basic functioning hurts me. Open to DMs, would really like some friends who understand because no one in my life gets it, especially the aspect of wanting to be able to die.

 

[silentcicada]

Sorry if this doesn't really count but I have brain damage from multiple medical procedures. I have amnesia at 22 and find it difficult to connect to my peers or my own interests since I simply cannot remember them well. Some days are better than others but I still struggle a lot without a decent support system.

Having friends who understand would be great, feel free to pm.

 

[DEATH IS FREEDOM]

Chronic illness and chronic pain are meaningless sufferings and serve no purpose. I have been plauged by these health issues for a few years. Due to the lack of euthanasia and the denial of death, I am expected to be tormented until the natural death that may take decades.

 

[Cantbereal]

Need help pharma injured. In pa usa. Need friend. Ctbt help talk guidance

51 female serious inquiries only

 

[HerbieHoover]

ME/CFS here. 30 years.

 

[lupussucks224]

My autoimmune disease ruined my life. Not only has my face turned to a ballon with major swelling and bad acne and the pain. The one thing I loved about myself was my brain. I was an amassing writer and communicator but the brain fog is so extreme I now talk like a 3 year old. The girl who went from talking to anyone and everyone can hardly even talk to my own friends. I have lost my job , dropped out of college , I have no friends anymore while also in a lot of pain. My hair fell out. And I have extreme swelling in my hands, arms, feet and legs. I'm trapped in the own prision which is my body. Along with terrible derealization. I either cbt or continue to live in this body forever. I've let everyone in my life down. Not to mention I was supposed to major in public relations because I loved talking to people now I literally act autistic.

My autoimmune disease ruined my life. Not only has my face turned to a ballon with major swelling and bad acne and the pain. The one thing I loved about myself was my brain. I was an amassing writer and communicator but the brain fog is so extreme I now talk like a 3 year old. The girl who went from talking to anyone and everyone can hardly even talk to my own friends. I have lost my job , dropped out of college , I have no friends anymore while also in a lot of pain. My hair fell out. And I have extreme swelling in my hands, arms, feet and legs. I'm trapped in the own prision which is my body. Along with terrible derealization. I either cbt or continue to live in this body forever. I've let everyone in my life down. Not to mention I was supposed to major in public relations because I loved talking to people now I literally act autistic.

I will never go on a date, go out drinking with my friends or be myself every again.

 

[RandomUser25]

I'm much better off then most posters better. Have several more health conditions, but the major problem are chronic migraines. On a ND months I have 20+ attacks only half of them I can moderate with drugs. For the rest I'm left with crushing headache and nausea.
That on top of trying to hold onto a job and being a migrant without much options is killing me.

 

[HD72]

I'm much better off then most posters better. Have several more health conditions, but the major problem are chronic migraines. On a ND months I have 20+ attacks only half of them I can moderate with drugs. For the rest I'm left with crushing headache and nausea.
That on top of trying to hold onto a job and being a migrant without much options is killing me.

I have migraines also on top of everything else.
Pretty sure the meds are contributing to my ill health. Once they harm u u r screwed.

 

[BirdWithoutWings]

I was finally able to get onto disability recently. I'm tentatively diagnosed with a condition called arterial tuortosity syndrome as I had a gene of unknown significance that was insanely rare (0.000000124) along with all the symptoms of a connective tissue disorder (All physicians suspected marfans, but ATS was the only gene that popped up on the genetic panel.) I've been bed bound for a solid two years now as my major joints dislocate frequently causing immense pain. The bright side is I have slightly less stress in regards to going homeless, on the other hand, the income from disability only covers my rent+ half of my hydro maybe. The "bright" side is it gives me an excuse to fuel my eating disorder as I was made to gain 40 pounds by my DR. I can't gain weight if I can't afford groceries! Plus, the lower weight makes my knees and hip joints dislocate less frequently which is always a positive.

 

[vaqueero]

New member here with degenerative nerve disease and I've been reading through some of the stories here for the last hour.

I just want to say that there are a lot of very strong and brave people here dealing with some truly awful health situations. I'm not that strong or brave. I just keep getting out of bed every fucking morning because I can't figure out how to leave without passing a lot of pain onto my loved ones. I've thought many times of "falling" off a cliff somewhere but what if I survive?

My life has been dominated by my disease and it has now stolen just about everything but my mind. I don't work anymore which I thought would be great, but all of the fun stuff I had planned is pretty much gone. Mornings are the worst. I've been suicidal since I was in my teens and every year I tell myself that if I still feel this awful a year from now, I can exit outta here. Don't know what else to say except thanks for helping me not feel so alone. God forbid we should openly talk about suicide and have our feelings acknowledged and honored.

 

[nottinghams]

Oh my God oh my God. if I wasn't going to ctb in 1-3 days (thank God)

what even the fork is going on with me?! blood tests are lopsy. iv had facial paralysis, im in terrible nerve pain, ive recently had trouble breathing..yet doctors keep tossing me around to other doctors. they always seem concerned. had recent one say she had no clue why my PCP wasn't doing more. genuinely cannot explain the phenomena of this. probably could've made more progress but doctors not doing their part.

and im getting worse too. ive been sick since November of last year, and the facial paralysis and worsening nerve pain is new, never happened except in the last two weeks.
I think I'm probably dying. I think I might die if i wasnt ctb. but that dying ofc could be months. especially if its that type of disease I suspect (blood disorder, parkinson's disease,)

 

[RandomUser25]

I have migraines also on top of everything else.
Pretty sure the meds are contributing to my ill health. Once they harm u u r screwed.

Can relate, depends on what you are talking, but none of them are good. Our current treatment of migraines is on "slap stone leeches on them and hope it works" stage. I have up on antidepressants since the marginally helped with migraines and fucked up everything else. I can at least afford triptans where I'm at.
Hope you can find something that helps.

 

[meandering-river]

ankolysing spondylitis, ulcerative colitis, long covid (3y9m), sleep apnea, asthma, complex ptsd due to childhood sexual abuse and compound by living in a abusive marriage for 20 years . And working on a MS diagnosis That's the latest. 4 brain lesions found. But there's a possibility that it's only a prescribed drug induced one off demylinating event. So I have to wait a year and have as bigger round of MRIs. I'm very annoyed that I have another disease that won't kill me. Won't shorten my life but will simply make life even more painful and miserable. A year waiting to see what part of my body will malfunction next. The constant never ending pain and fatigue have won. I just want to live without mental or emotional constant pain. Or not live at all. That would be ok too

 

[HD72]

ankolysing spondylitis, ulcerative colitis, long covid (3y9m), sleep apnea, asthma, complex ptsd due to childhood sexual abuse and compound by living in a abusive marriage for 20 years . And working on a MS diagnosis That's the latest. 4 brain lesions found. But there's a possibility that it's only a prescribed drug induced one off demylinating event. So I have to wait a year and have as bigger round of MRIs. I'm very annoyed that I have another disease that won't kill me. Won't shorten my life but will simply make life even more painful and miserable. A year waiting to see what part of my body will malfunction next. The constant never ending pain and fatigue have won. I just want to live without mental or emotional constant pain. Or not live at all. That would be ok too

Same place. I am so sorry.

 

[goodbyengo]

I have a condition that makes it difficult to swallow. I can barely eat or drink, and I struggle to breathe. It also affects my sinuses and ears. I got it two years ago after I was put on a heavy dose of antibiotics that ended up paralyzing the nerves in my GI tract. I am only 24 and my life is ruined.

 

[PhDone]

Hi all, just joined. I have severe ME/CFS. Bloody awful disease. Also co-morbid stuff like POTS and dysautonomia. A then just to make me even more insane, a catastrophic tinnitus that produces constant sounds like clanking and machine guns in my head all day and night. Lost sleep, my job, friends, cant travel or return home to family, cant walk, move, socialise. Just sat at home and mostly in bed all day. Gone from a super active, high achieving life. Quite honestly over it. The thought of living endlessly like this is way beyond me. Hope to meet and chat through all things around a way out that might let me find peace.

Looking forward to contributing.