Discussion Xmas Jokes and related

[stargazer]

A guy decides to buy his new girlfriend a pair of gloves for Christmas. After all, they've only been dating for three weeks so it seems like the ideal gift - romantic, yet not too personal.

He asks the girlfriend's younger sister to accompany him to buy them then she can point out a pair she'd like. They go to the mall and the sister points out a pair of white gloves which the guy then buys.

The sister then picks up a pair of panties for herself and buys them.

But during the wrapping, the clerk mixes up the parcels without anyone realising. As a result, the sister gets the gloves and the guy takes home a gift box containing the panties.

Without checking, the guy rushes the gift to his sweetheart, but only after drafting this loving and helpful note to accompany it:

"I chose these because I notice you are not in the habit of wearing any when we go out in the evening. If it had not been for your sister, I would have chosen the long ones with the buttons, but she wears the short ones that are easier to remove.

These are a delicate shade, but the lady I bought them from showed me a pair she'd been wearing for the last three weeks and they were hardly soiled.

I had her try yours on for me and she looked really smart.

I wish I was there to put them on for you the first time. There's no doubt other hands will come in contact with them before I have a chance to see you again.



When you take them off remember to blow in them before putting them away, as they will naturally be a little damp from wearing.

Just think how many times I will kiss them during the coming year. I hope you will wear them for the coming Christmas Eve.

P.S. The latest style is to wear them folded down with a little fur showing."

Oh. Oh my. I'm speechless Johnny. You've out done yourself.

Now. Enough of me encouraging naughty jokes, we don't want to get too off-topic or too...naughty.

Got to keep it mild to clean.

 

[Johnnythefox]

 

[divinized]

Idk why I laugh a lil when I see this vine

 

[Johnnythefox]

 

[therhydler]

 

[Lra888]

JOKE:

Q: Why does Santa Clause live on the North Pole instead of the South?

A: Because the Nazis have a Secret UFO base in Antarctica and he doesn't want to be around that shit!

 

[Johnnythefox]