writing suicide notes is so fucking hard. advice?

[wannabeangel]

i've been trying to write my notes, i want a draft them even if i dont have a set date or anything yet. but FUCK its so hard to write them, especially my ones to specific people. i have one main note and then notes for specific people. wording everything i feel is rough, and most of my note is saying im sorry and expressing my love for my family and loved ones. im trying to make a list of wishes for after my death too, mainly what to do with my body. idrc what they do with it, but i want part of me to be in nature somewhere. my dream since i was a kid was to die in a forest, and let nature eat my body and return to the earth.

does anyone have any thoughts or tips for what should be in a note? i know its a very personal thing, but knowing what not to say, and what to say is helpful. i want my note to bring slight relief, i know it will be hard for the people who read it so my efforts may not mean much, but i still wanna try. i try to reassure that it's none of their faults, and that no one could have changed my mind so they don't think they could've done something to stop it

i found this site thats kinda helpful https://archive.ashspace.org/ashbusstop.org/Note.html but i want other people's thoughts and experiences on here please

feel free to share your struggle with writing suicide notes too even if you dont have advice, its just kinda nice knowing im not alone

 

[12345six]

When I wrote my first one I got the general shit out of the way first in a few pages then I titled a paragraph with the name of the person that section was for. Just make sure that whoever finds your note will be kind enough to share the parts you want shared.

 

[wannabeangel]

When I wrote my first one I got the general shit out of the way first in a few pages then I titled a paragraph with the name of the person that section was for. Just make sure that whoever finds your note will be kind enough to share the parts you want shared.

thank you, and i plan to send notes to people by email that i dont think my mom would share. my notes are in word documents so it wont be hard to share with a email that got a timer

 

[iguazo falls]

i wish i had advice. i struggle with this too because i keep going on paranoid rants in it since i know authorities will be going thru my stuff. i think overall if you say its not their faults that will mean the most. the scheduled email thing is a good idea because if for whatever reason you don't go through with it, you have some time to retract them.

for me i struggle with not insulting the coroner/cops etc because i feel they have all violated my mind and privacy since i was young so its hard for me not to get angry and then i get angry about being misunderstood and despite the fact that if i succeeded, i would be dead, and that i know from experience you can't force someone to understand you even if they've spent decades living with you, i feel a need to control the outcome. i don't really feel sorry to most people and then i get mad that any note i meant for anyone gets spread around or my item wishes are not respected. i just want my partner to get the best deal if i go i don't want my parents in my shit then sharing falsehoods to the news. my perspective is different to yours, but man writing a note is hard because you know the ripple effect but theres no guarantee it will do what you want it to or even be read by who you want it to be read by.