Venting Why is it that killing myself is the ONLY thing that feels right?

[lost_one]

Why is it that no matter what I do? How hard I try? Everything I do, everything I try just feels wrong. I hate days like today, I don't know if it will ever feel diferent and in days like this I wish I had the courage to just give up, but I am a coward, always have been. I wish I would just get hit by a truck or a drunk driver. Maybe crash my motorcycle, idk. I hate myself so much. I am so tired. My existence feels wrong, like I should have died tragically as a kid. I wish my existence could be completely erased.

 

[Mindfukz]

Same here, i tried talking to my best friends but they are like trust me everything will be okay, it will take time, but how can I explain them the pain I'm carrying everyday, can't pretend anymore to be okay, every day every night just one thought, I want to end it but i'm not able to move forward because of my mom, i don't know what to do I do not want to hurt her, but at the same time do not to how long I can take it