Why are you still alive?

[Rynalia]

Self-sabotage, and it's complicated.

 

[LastLoveSong]

fuck knows

 

[TransTaxEvader]

just processing everything. my best friend who told me we were gonna go together couldn't take it anymore and left without me.

 

[haveyourownway]

Mainly because I can't stand to think of how my family will be affected. My family loves me and thinking of them finding me is an unbearable thought. Especially my mother who visits me almost every week and poured years into me for it to be for nothing.

 

[AuraByte]

My family who rely on me financially and my pets.

 

[psp3000]

made some commitments/plans when I felt hopeful and optimistic (and worries about people using my death to their advantage)

only for things to get worse
so I am trying not to commit to or plan anything else
and I try to think of every possible negative outcome for things to stop myself from being disappointed again or possibly making things a lot worse than they are now