Venting Whhhhhhhhhhyyyyyyyyyyyyy??!!

[MeltingHeart]

Why the fucking hell in gods good name (im not religious btw) are they so fucking determined to keep me alive now?! now that I am in an extreme state of distress, profoundly unhappy, desperate for escape?!! Literally ignored me for most of my life, barely ever even spoke to me!, never helped me-finacially or otherwise-left me to fend for myself virtually entirely from a v.young age, never known about my life, asked or come to see where i am living, if i am safe or ANYTHING about my life whatso fucking ever!! & now I have had enough-now I want out- now you want to get involved ?!! Well just fucking fuck right offff!!! phew sorry- im going for a cigarette now.

 

[waterbottleman]

That sucks and sounds frustrating.

Personally I'm going to see how long I can go without eating anything. It's been a day so far but now I want to challenge myself and see how long I can go without eating anything. Whether I drop dead or stay alive/lose weight it's a win win as far as I'm concerned.

 

[Feelingsruiner]

I think people just refuse to feel guilty for doing nothing when it gets this serious. A sort of selfishness, to make them feel better about themselves. Before that they just don't give a f about the consequences of their behaviour.

 

[AnxiouslyDepressed]

That sucks and sounds frustrating.

Personally I'm going to see how long I can go without eating anything. It's been a day so far but now I want to challenge myself and see how long I can go without eating anything. Whether I drop dead or stay alive/lose weight it's a win win as far as I'm concerned.

I managed 5 days, after day 3 hunger doesn't exist

OP you know where I am if you need to talk

 

[SinisterKid]

That was almost a full blown vent, you just need a few more fucks and one or two other random curses to make the grade

 

[Wreck-it-Riley]

Im afraid of this from my BIo family too. My last hospitalization i ended up living with my father, and it only took 3 weeks before he tried to push me down a flight of stairs. If anything happens again, i haven't talked to them in 3 years, but im sure they would love to fuck me up even more. People cant mind their own gods damn business.

 

[MeltingHeart]

s

I think people just refuse to feel guilty for doing nothing when it gets this serious. A sort of selfishness, to make them feel better about themselves. Before that they just don't give a f about the consequences of their behaviour.

so f*ckin weird to start feeling guilt at this late stage-instead of maybe feeling a little bit earlier on- and maybe just maybe reaching out to me then, when I needed it & earlier-my cries for help were subtle but evident & ignored!! god i just want to shout and swear today and then f*ckin slash my wrists or something!! but im too scared to do it

I think people just refuse to feel guilty for doing nothing when it gets this serious. A sort of selfishness, to make them feel better about themselves. Before that they just don't give a f about the consequences of their behaviour.

I have to be an adult and start trying to kill myself before getting a tiny tiny bit of cold, begrudging, distant attention from the person whos sperm i came from, yay!!

 

[Wreck-it-Riley]

s

so f*ckin weird to start feeling guilt at this late stage-instead of maybe feeling a little bit earlier on- and maybe just maybe reaching out to me then, when I needed it & earlier-my cries for help were subtle but evident & ignored!! god i just want to shout and swear today and then f*ckin slash my wrists or something!! but im too scared to do it

I have to be an adult and start trying to kill myself before getting a tiny tiny bit of cold, begrudging, distant attention from the person whos sperm i came from, yay!!

Im in the same mood. I hate that i have nothing to break and smash. Dumps should collect breakable things and rent a room for breaking it. Id pay to break shit.

 

[MeltingHeart]

That was almost a full blown vent, you just need a few more fucks and one or two other random curses to make the grade

Plenty more where this came from!! im normally calm ,fairly restrained and quiet (ish), its all f*ckin coming out now-hopefully I can go full blown psycho (dont worry i wouldnt ever hear anyone else-not even a fly) & I can do something extreme to end my life!! maybe this is the force i need to channel to get over SI!!

 

[I’vehadenough]

Haha I feel the same way! It's like they want to trap us in this shithole.

 

[MeltingHeart]

I think people just refuse to feel guilty for doing nothing when it gets this serious. A sort of selfishness, to make them feel better about themselves. Before that they just don't give a f about the consequences of their behaviour.

so sad - not just for myself-but for many others too, esp.younger folk, that it takes getting to this stage to get attention- or be heard whether thats from loved ones, friends, or the medical professional- like I have had years of severe insomnia problems, eating disorder, v.bad ibs, atleast one wrist slashing-with stiches, panic attacks and anxiety, on anti-depressents for 20 years- no doctor has ever refered me for ANY counselling or therapy- wait till yr a fully grown troubled adult and try and hang yrslef a few times-oh lets see if we can refer you for therapy now_ yeah good one! FUCK OFF too F*ckin late !!

Im in the same mood. I hate that i have nothing to break and smash. Dumps should collect breakable things and rent a room for breaking it. Id pay to break shit.

I have heard of this as a thing that people do- wreck rooms or something weird like that

That was almost a full blown vent, you just need a few more fucks and one or two other random curses to make the grade

defo need to add a few mutha f*ckers & c**ts !!

Haha I feel the same way! It's like they want to trap us in this shithole.

just cos they want to stay in their miserable lives- some of us wanted more for oursleves and would rather end it then live an inferior and mediocre existence!! maybe they have no imagination?! (yeah im in full blown bitter mode right now)

 

[Feelingsruiner]

so sad - not just for myself-but for many others too, esp.younger folk, that it takes getting to this stage to get attention- or be heard whether thats from loved ones, friends, or the medical professional- like I have had years of severe insomnia problems, eating disorder, v.bad ibs, atleast one wrist slashing-with stiches, panic attacks and anxiety, on anti-depressents for 20 years- no doctor has ever refered me for ANY counselling or therapy- wait till yr a fully grown troubled adult and try and hang yrslef a few times-oh lets see if we can refer you for therapy now_ yeah good one! FUCK OFF too F*ckin late !!

Yup. Been troubled forever and nobody even proposed therapy, but wait until I do something really life threatening and watch them all finally reacting (and in the wrong ways possible) -.-

 

[AnxiouslyDepressed]

Im in the same mood. I hate that i have nothing to break and smash. Dumps should collect breakable things and rent a room for breaking it. Id pay to break shit.

There's actually a place exactly like that in the city I live in