Venting what if you're being yourself but you're selfish in reality?

[404]

so im trying to "be myself" these past few months but it's actually hurting people.

i realize that i always want something from people and i manipulate them in some way to get it.

i always justify this by saying that i'm making the most out of everything since i won't get this oppurtunity in the future but deep down, i know this is bs.

i'm considering going back to being a people pleaser so i don't have to deal with this dilemma anymore but i'm unable to do it properly too. some people say that being a peple pleaser is annoying but is "being myself" better than that?

i don't want to die but after reflecting on what i've done, maybe i deserve it

 

[gabworse]

I can tell you that I find myself in many of the things you wrote, if being yourself for you means manipulating people and not pleasing them I'm sorry to tell you but a

long and painful existence awaits you.

I've been living the same way as you for years, and what I can tell you is that yes, people like us often deserve to die.

 

[EvisceratedJester]

If you recognize that this is an issue then you could improving on it. "Being yourself" doesn't mean you can't go out of your way to try and work on your flaws.