Venting today is my cat's 1st death anniversary

[sadee]

i miss my cat one of the reasons i want to die is that i believe i will meet him again i hope we meet each other again soon. please. it hurts so much I cant even cry.. i want to die. i want to see him again .. please

how do you even move on from this fuck every time i get like this it's like nothing ever changed, like I'm back to square one, where I'm crying my eyes out in front of his cold body

i was the one who told the doctor to euthanize him oh my god I'm such a bad owner i was hoping i could get euthanized with him there.. I couldn't bear it i wish i died when he died so I won't have to be like this

 

[pillfriends]

how do you even move on from this fuck every time i get like this it's like nothing ever changed, like I'm back to square one, where I'm crying my eyes out in front of his cold body

heavily relate to everything you said, especially this. my dog's 1st death anniversary is in august and idk how i'll feel.


i've had a way worse reaction to my dog's paasing compared to some of my family members.


one of the worst parts about death of an animal (especially your pet) is the fact that their lives depended on you. for their whole life you were all they had, and taking that into consideration it just makes everything way worse...


i still remember my dog, everything we did together, and all of his quirks. it sucks that they don't have a long lifespan but there is nothing we can do about it. if anything, i'm just so glad i could cherish those moments i had with him. he was the least judgemental person in my life.


the memory of your cat will forever live within you. no matter how old you get, or how much you forget about your cat, i'm 100% certain that you will ALWAYS remember that you loved him.


writing this made my mood 10x worse, but it's okay. i'm glad i shifted my thoughts towards something positive i had in my life

 

[ApparentlyNot]

I feel the same. I dont like to talk about it because I know people will not understand my grief and they will not take it seriously. I lost my soul cat in February. I wish I had died with him. I wish more than anything I believed in an afterlife where his soul was in tact. It devastates me in a way I can't describe to feel in my heart that I will not ever see him again, even in death. Something broke in me when he died and I will never get it back. I know I will never love another the way I loved him, and i know no one will ever love me the way he loved me - I am alone now and I have no reason to be here. It feels as though an integral piece of my soul was violent ripped out of my body and that I am left with a gaping, bloody hole. It feels physical and visceral and nauseating. I had wanted to prepare to die with him, as he was getting older... but he unexpectedly had a stroke and I didn't have time to prepare. I would give up everything I have left just to see him one more time. I am so dissociated but I feel like screaming and wailing when I allow myself to feel the loss. I'm sorry. I hope you are right, and that you will see your boy in the after life. I think you are lucky though... to have experienced that kind of love at all. I consider myself so.