Method The end

[curiousbeing]

I didn't know my life could get so worse. I am determined that in one of these days, I will use drowning in a sea as a way to ctb. There is 10% chance i may decide to live. enough is enough.

But there is a point, where i no longer dream about ctb; my plans become decisive. At that point, i really started taking this ctb, correctly doing this, very seriously


my reasons:

1) health care. Just in case i break my spine accidentally in a accident, there is no competent, caring doctor who will helo me. They do bare minimum and leave you in pain. while charging a lot and screaming at you if your problem gets too much for them

2) fear of disability. If, say, I am suddenly blind, who will take care of me without telling me how much burden I am?

 

[trappedinthislife]

Sometimes I wish I could sign an agreement that says something like "If I am unresponsive for over 30 days you have full permission to CTB me", my biggest fear is what if tomorrow I wake up with my body completely paralyzed and I can't talk or do anything. How will I let them know I don't wanna live anymore?

 

[curiousbeing]

yes. Exactly Such fears. I feel horrible to be dependent on people. They will just force fed me whatever they can, hit me if I am too much etc

Sometimes I wish I could sign an agreement that says something like "If I am unresponsive for over 30 days you have full permission to CTB me", my biggest fear is what if tomorrow I wake up with my body completely paralyzed and I can't talk or do anything. How will I let them know I don't wanna live anymore?

 

[DeIetedUser4739]

I'm scared of this too.