Saponification

Saponification

Member
Jun 27, 2024
20
So I have actually chosen a method and I do feel like dying right now, but I'm having this weird, ridiculous thought where I think it's not a good time to do it yet. Like I want my death to be... not anticlimactic. Yeah, sounds stupid, I know. I guess the reason is my ego dislikes the thought of me dying on a random, unremarkable day even though I recognize I'm not special and I'm just an insignificant creature with a negligible impact on the world.

Anyhow, like I said, I do wish to die as soon as possible, so I guess I'm just gonna ignore this thought and carry on with my CTB.

I'm wondering if anyone ever experienced something similar to this.
 
AbsentMindedHuman

AbsentMindedHuman

One day, ill be free
Apr 25, 2024
127
I think most people would chalk that up to Survival instinct. I felt the same way during one of my attempts. I did everything right, planned it out got to my spot, was ready, but something inside just reminded me of how insignificant i was in that moment. I think we as humans just want to leave something behind. or have an impact in some way.... even if that impact is our death.
 
Just_Another_Person

Just_Another_Person

Experienced
Sep 16, 2024
202
It is not stupid, it is a serious decision/moment and if you think your time didn't come there is nothing wrong in not doing it. Remember, at the end of the day the decision is yours.
 

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