Venting rant because why not

[finnn]

whats the point of living, really? Sure there are some happy moments, but after collage, what am I gonna be? Some middle aged person, working at a job that'll make me miserable for the rest of my life until i retire, which will only be a few more years till you kick the bucket? i don't see myself ever having a family, or a happy life. i don't really have much potential. watching the people around me die? growing old? dying from cancer, which most of my family has? why not end it now, when really it's not like things will get better. People say to stick around, because things will improve, but that's not always true. I've felt like this for years, on and off, and it doesn't get better, only worse. i do have some goals, but they aren't really in reguards to my future. most people don't get a happy ending and that feels the reality. plus, all i do is cause harm to those around me. Me living will only harm those i love, so it's better to save them the pain and ctb now. i'm a money drain on my parents, a strain on my loved ones and friends. life isn't really worth it. it's easy for people to say it gets better, when for some people it doesn't. all i can see is myself dying from my own hands, and honestly, it gives me a sense of peace, knowing i can decide my own fate. i'm religious, and tbh at least if i kill myself i'll be in a peaceful afterlife, hopefully reunited with my loved ones, that doesn't sound as bad as rotting away at an old age, watching those around me die. anyways, ig that's my vent. goodnight.

 

[FuneralCry]

There certainly is no point to existing, and at least to me something so unnecessary and useless as existing could never be worth it in any way. Life really is just a cycle of endless days that repeats in a loop, our only fate as humans is to suffer, deteriorate and die, life could never lead to anywhere apart from that and I do personally always view it as being preferable to not exist. There is simply nothing to be gained by existing, instead there are just ways for life to torment us so unnecessarily and there could never be any peace from suffering in this cruel world, I understand why you would feel so relieved at the thought of suicide.

 

[Ki_Nam]

Being born wasn't a choice. That's when it starts, this illusion of choice - this world we live in. People make it their business to create a point to existence, and gives you an illusion that things we do is by choice. It really is just a loop. There's work, and then there's amenities and entertainment that people drown themselves in and call it living. It's all distractions from the ultimate truth and final destination.