Ohh shit

[new.solution1]

I fell into a pattern of drinking everyday. Because of this, I wasn't able to CTB. I found this troublesome.

Today, once again I had random improvement that did not feel to have any connection with my condition. I don't know how much longer I can hold out for.

I think I can rest easy knowing that I can't just keep "improving" forever. A human being doesn't just feel better everyday for no reason forever. Eventually, this will stop, I can once again mentally assess the situation like I always do, and I will CTB. Finally.

I feel I can hope for something better after death. With my life now, I can only hope for what is realistic.

 

[makethepainstop]

Only you can realize your own truths, and define your desires and actions.

 

[FuneralCry]

I really hope and believe that there is nothing after this, we simply cease to exist. That would be ideal for me. It sounds tiring what you are going through and I'm sorry that you are in this situation. I wish you relief from suffering.

 

[theboy]

join alcoholics anonymous

 

[locked*n*loaded]

So, the alcohol is making you feel better? They say alcohol is a depressant. The cure for that? Never stop drinking.