jussrav
Experienced
- Sep 9, 2023
- 237
So I woke up again. Back in self destruction mode. I can't seem to do the simplest of tasks. Get breakfast go back to bed. Lie down take it easy I can't do any of it. Instead I get worked up seem to fall into negative things and then make myself feel worse and then my self destruction starts. I dont know what peace is anymore. I feel very drained, defeated, deflated by everything that is happening to me. This is me now for life. I have to try to cope which I am failing at or basically die to get away from it. Funny 3 years ago life was so different, good job, health, no sleeping issues, no mental battles. Now I cant get a job, life is full of regrets and mistakes made. Even flat mate when I talk to him says he doesn't know what to say anymore. I can't seem to keep it together. I wish I was dead. The torture everyday is killing me. The headaches, then desire to live, no happiness, joy , laughter everything that makes life good is sadly not in my destiny. So I can get access to large quantity of prescription drugs. Which can I take? Thanks Rav
