One fuckup and it's all gone

[Al_stargate]

I wonder how many people here had life ruined because one small unforseable mistake. Maybe not even your fault.

For me one fuckup at the worst possible time and it's all over. Been through hell in my life, succeeded against all odds and then when I'm supposed to be on cruise mode, it all goes to shit. Makes me feel like it was a setup from the start. Like I was supposed to just suffer all my life but against all odds I managed to get out of it, only for universe or god or destiny or whatever the fuck to say "yeah right bitch, go back to being miserable". I don't know what it is. Can't accept life being so random. I used to be spiritual and thought that if I do right and good, I'll have good karma and will not have random shit go wrong. I guess I was wrong. Life got no chill, it's all a game of chances. One minute you feeling good about yourself and have dreams and aspirations, and next you're in a world of misery. And when it's because of others it's hard to accept. That God or Universe would let this happen to you when you been trying to be a good person. Can't accept this. My suicide gonna be a protest against the injustice. Protest against God/Universe. Fuck everything. There is no meaning to this shit.

 

[tonicer]

I fucked it all up before it even began. I was born with a suction cup device thing and it deformed my head a bit so once i go bald i will look even uglier than i already am. I also had the umbilical cord wrapped around my neck a couple of time. I was suicidal from the get go.

Also when i went to elementary school the neighbor kids came to our door and asked if i wanted to walk to school with them ... i declined so often they gave up and that is when i became a loner. Now i am 43 years old guy and a KHHV with no real friends. I wish i could go back in time and go with them and become a part of a friends group who does cool stuff together. I don't want to be alone all the time but making friends at this age is damn near impossible.

 

[itsgone2]

I also had birth issues. A broken collarbone. Also my mom was given some medicine to make her forget the pregnancy. It was supposed to be outlawed by then but she swears to it.
I don't know what affect either had.
I was also odd from the start. Declining things for no reason. Not everything. Just always a coward.