my place of comfort is ruined

[nails]

i feel like shit. i'm deteriorating in every aspect and i just want to die as soon as possible. before, i only felt at peace when i was sleeping, but now that's ruined. i keep having nightmares and i'm scared to sleep now. sometimes the nightmares consist of some typical unrealistic scenario like being chased by a monster, which still leave me anxious, but i don't even get those that often anymore. my nightmares are scarily realistic and mostly consist of someone i deeply love and care about leaving me or dying.
i can't even determine if/when i'm awake when i have these. i spend half of the day checking my phone, checking on the person constantly because i have no idea if they're actually gone or if it was just in the nightmare. it takes forever for that anxiety to go away and for me to realize that i'm no longer in a nightmare.

because of this, i'm constantly anxious. i'm scared of sleeping now. i'm tired of this confusion and anxiety. there's now no area in my life where i experience comfort. i just want to die, i can't live like this.

i apologize for poor grammar or spelling, my head won't stop spinning and i'm trying my best.

 

[hoppybunny]

The brain is a bitch. The same thing happened to me as well. When my depression was really bad, i spent all my time asleep but eventually the stress and guilt of dodging irl responsibilities caught up to me and started causing me nightmares.


Nightmares are just your brain trying to prep you to face fears you refuse to face in real life.

 

[WeDontKnowTheFuture]

i feel like shit. i'm deteriorating in every aspect and i just want to die as soon as possible. before, i only felt at peace when i was sleeping, but now that's ruined. i keep having nightmares and i'm scared to sleep now. sometimes the nightmares consist of some typical unrealistic scenario like being chased by a monster, which still leave me anxious, but i don't even get those that often anymore. my nightmares are scarily realistic and mostly consist of someone i deeply love and care about leaving me or dying.
i can't even determine if/when i'm awake when i have these. i spend half of the day checking my phone, checking on the person constantly because i have no idea if they're actually gone or if it was just in the nightmare. it takes forever for that anxiety to go away and for me to realize that i'm no longer in a nightmare.

because of this, i'm constantly anxious. i'm scared of sleeping now. i'm tired of this confusion and anxiety. there's now no area in my life where i experience comfort. i just want to die, i can't live like this.

i apologize for poor grammar or spelling, my head won't stop spinning and i'm trying my best.

I'm sorry you're going through something like this. Maybe you can try to analyze what these nightmares tell about you and your life to try to reduces them. My dreams are generaly desires that i cannot access in real life becoming " reality", frustration that i have in my real life turning into some scenario where i relive it, People that traumatize me who arise and put me in situations similar to the one they had put me in. But most of the time fortunately, my dreams are the first case. The nightmare you have certainly tell something about you, your past, your condition and you can become a detective to clarify what's going on and what's the link with your awakened experience.