Venting My "boyfriend?" Knows i ordered SN

[SleepingBliss]

Hello friend I commented recently that my boyfriend recently cheated and I made myself a promise that if I lost him for any reason I would ctb as I wanted to but couldn't do that to him and could possibly see a future with him but that has changed now due to the cheating so I ordered my sn and it arrives next week I was going to walk out to the woods to a nice spot I like and take it so I was far away from any possible 'rescue' and not tell anyone I would just disappear and be missing until found dead but my boyfriend went through my emails and saw the order confirmation so now he knows I ordered and he knows what it is because he knows my suicide history.

I call him boyfriend because we have not formally broken up due to me looking for new accommodation. I am worried he will intervene or tell others.

 

[i dont feel real.]

Shit. That sucks. Are you sure he has seen it? Dang. You have to talk about that with him. If you really want to do it, he might tell someone and make an intervention. I don't really know what to tell you. I wish you the best. I hope you find peace and make out somehow to the best place or situation you wish for.

 

[Praestat_Mori]

I'm sorry that happened. It makes your situation more difficult. Y did he go through your emails at all?

 

[SleepingBliss]

Shit. That sucks. Are you sure he has seen it? Dang. You have to talk about that with him. If you really want to do it, he might tell someone and make an intervention. I don't really know what to tell you. I wish you the best. I hope you find peace and make out somehow to the best place or situation you wish for.

I saw a screenshot of the confirmation on his phone so I know he knows

 

[SleepingBliss]

I'm sorry that happened. It makes your situation more difficult. Y did he go through your emails at all?

There's a lot of mistrust since the cheating, I was logged into my Google on his computer and he went on my email

 

[i dont feel real.]

I saw a screenshot of the confirmation on his phone so I know he knows

As long as he doesn't know the time and location, you might be just fine.

 

[esistzeit]

If I had a girlfriend I wouldn't cheat on her.

 

[Rev346]

Cheaters rarely learn their lesson. Dump him because trust will never be the same. Best to put ctb plans on hold until you can fully break away from the relationship and any actions that your soon to be ex may perform. Sorry to hear that he cheated, it's such a massive breach of trust. Best wishes for you going forward.

 

[Cress]

The only reason I can imagine Your boyfriend would take a screenshot is to confront you with it at a later date or to report you to the authorities to have you involuntarily committed.

It looks like you might not have gone through with your plan? Are you doing alright? As others have said it might be the best course of action to separate with your boyfriend and Wait A good amount of time before making a decision to end your life.

Wishing you nothing but the best I hope you're able to navigate through this. My DMS are open if you ever need someone to talk too. Please take care of yourself.