Living is just so unbearable

[sohopelessandempty]

I can't ctb for reasons that take too long to explain, maybe I'll end up making a post about why. So I'm trapped in this suffering until I die of old age and I just can't accept that I'll have to be in pain for the rest of my life. That's basically forever since it's MY WHOLE LIFE and even though forever is forever, if I'm in pain until I'm dead, to me that is forever since who knows what happens once I'm dead. Life is in a way forever. At least it feels that way. The pain is so unbearable and excruciating and I don't know what it's like not to feel this way. I'll probably never know. It always lingers, even if it's not as bad sometimes. I truly hate being alive. Honestly I just need to get these feelings out before I go to bed. Should I make a vent thread? It's just I feel like if I just made a thread for all my vents nobody would see them, and if no one sees them it's basically the same as writing in a diary which hasn't helped me nearly as much. I think I mention this in another post, sorry. But anyways I want people to see but only the people here. I want someone to acknowledge and care about my pain.

 

[FuneralCry]

I really understand, I also find it so unbearable and torturous to exist, all I want is to be gone and never suffer again and I always suffer from being trapped in this existence so cruelly denied the option to just cease existing peacefully, I wish you the best.

 

[sohopelessandempty]

I really understand, I also find it so unbearable and torturous to exist, all I want is to be gone and never suffer again and I always suffer from being trapped in this existence so cruelly denied the option to just cease existing peacefully, I wish you the best.

Yes I don't want to suffer anymore either but like you said we can't have a painless death. And people wonder why suicidal people don't just do it already but besides all the other reasons, this is a huge one. Why would I want to attempt suicide and risk pain when pain and suffering is the reason I want to die to begin with? I wish you the best too.