10000DaysTooMany
Member
- Apr 14, 2023
- 68
I haven't posted or commented in a bit on here. After fully deciding it was time for me to kill myself I spoke with my best friends openly about how I'm feeling. One friend highly encouraged me to try a new medicine again. I did but it didn't seem to help this time either. I'm doing my best to stay here for them but I just still don't want to.
In the last few months I've done everything I can to help myself feel better again. I tried a DMT cart and it was a very positive experience for me but it certainly could become negative for other people. Since then I've stopped using nicotine, weed and alcohol. (I've never done recreational drugs other then those). I feel more in control of my life and things don't feel hopeless right now but I still think the good isn't with the bad.
I think I'm where I should be in life right now. I have a nice apartment, I'm financially stable and there are plenty of people who love me. I think my depression stems from a lot of self hatred and I don't know how to or if I can change that. I'm not planning to CTB right now but if I do I just want to let the community here know I appreciate them existing and stopping me from trying a poorly planned traumatic method again like cutting, gunshot or OD. I hope no matter what path we take we all find the peace we need.
In the last few months I've done everything I can to help myself feel better again. I tried a DMT cart and it was a very positive experience for me but it certainly could become negative for other people. Since then I've stopped using nicotine, weed and alcohol. (I've never done recreational drugs other then those). I feel more in control of my life and things don't feel hopeless right now but I still think the good isn't with the bad.
I think I'm where I should be in life right now. I have a nice apartment, I'm financially stable and there are plenty of people who love me. I think my depression stems from a lot of self hatred and I don't know how to or if I can change that. I'm not planning to CTB right now but if I do I just want to let the community here know I appreciate them existing and stopping me from trying a poorly planned traumatic method again like cutting, gunshot or OD. I hope no matter what path we take we all find the peace we need.
