Venting just need to share my thoughts

[nyapoka]

how does anyone want to live a life on this planet. working, hurting, sleeping and repeating. there is just no hope for me to be willing to live a life. its exhausting, i feel peace thinking about death. no more hurt, no more pain. i spend anytime im awake planning, thinking about my plan, thinking about the eternal nothingness thats waiting for me. i dont know when im going to ctb. i want it to be before september. i need to plan better. all i know is ive made up my mind

 

[FuneralCry]

I also see death as being the only relief, I personally see so much beauty in the thought of eternal sleep, your feelings really are understandable, I know that I could never wish to exist, I see nothing desirable about having the ability to suffer endlessly in a futile existence, existing is tiresome and only the true peace of non-existence appeals to me. But anyway I hope you eventually find the freedom you search for, best wishes.