Help Important

[orlandom]

Deep down, I hope you won't leave. But this is so selfish of me. Therefore, of course I want you to feel good.

 

[TessB]

One of the funnier members, will be missed.

I'm a bit in love with you @GenesAndEnvironment

 

[BeansOfRequirement]

I'm a bit in love with you @GenesAndEnvironment

Then you are truly lost.

 

[KuriGohan&Kamehameha]

I'm sorry that this shit happened to you, both the malicious predators and the deception by bipolar bunny. Hope that you manage to find some peace and relief in spite of all this, even if that means leaving this place behind. We will miss you.

 

[Fragile]

I love men.. I don't hate them and I don't make up lies about them. I was on here defending inceldom a few weeks ago.

Don't get me wrong, I know.

I was responding to a guy who said that "men are all shit" then said that all of us are defending rapists and shortly after proceeded to post about him ogling your profile pic in other thread... some serious projection on his part that he tried to put on all of us.

 

[Sprite_Geist]

This is saddening. I do not know you much, but you often post in threads, and your posts are amusing, but also honest. It will suck to see you leave, but at the same time if your mental health is at risk then perhaps that is for the best - whatever makes you happy.

 

[TessB]

Ok so looking back over my old posts. My old accounts were called 'Bathsheba' and 'Claudia'
I found posts where I discussed Edward1 with another user who was targeted by him.

 

[Bat 17]

I miss Tess already !

 

[charlotte greentea]

This whole thread

 

[lofticries]

This entire thread....

I'm sad to see that Tess is leaving because of a couple of creeps. She was one of my fav posters. If you're lurking here, Tess I hope life improves greatly for you outside this forum.

Also shame on jeremy for cosplaying as an autistic lesbian on here. That ain't cool.

 

[Amumu]

Its because men don't get it that nothing happens about these problems.

So what do you want us to do concretely?
Because if 99% of decent men say
"it's terrible behaviour, they're horrible people"

I can assure you rapists won't give a fuck about it and will even find it amusing.
Like saying to a pedophile "don't rape kids, I can assure you it's really bad"
and then thinking it's going to change anything. WTF man.

Fuck that mentality of "all men are trash" really.
Please keep that shit in the US and the UK, thank you.

 

[Meditation guide]

The chase, the manipulation, the "catch" is the motivation. It can take place over months in the grooming phase, gradually breaking down barriers and gaining trust. If they give you their name or show a picture it probably isn't really them. Never think you are the only one they are chasing or talking to. They play the numbers game to see who takes the bait.

This is simply posting about what has happened to a lot of us. No one has suggested "all men are trash". Please do not make this into some kind of a battle, or twist it in such a way that either implies or states men are all bad. That's not what this is about at all.

This is not some kind of battle of the sexes. It's simply talking about what has happened to some of us. If people are saying that it's about hating men or bashing men then that tends to keep us silent and it's important to talk about this issue. This is not a man vs. women issue or a man bashing issue.

My purpose for talking about it is that I hope others will simply realize this goes on and take some precautions. Don't trust. Don't give your personal information out.

 

[TheNorthernSilence]

The chase, the manipulation, the "catch" is the motivation. It can take place over months in the grooming phase, gradually breaking down barriers and gaining trust. If they give you their name or show a picture it probably isn't really them. Never think you are the only one they are chasing or talking to. They play the numbers game to see who takes the bait.

This is simply posting about what has happened to a lot of us. No one has suggested "all men are trash". Please do not make this into some kind of a battle, or twist it in such a way that either implies or states men are all bad. That's not what this is about at all.

This is not some kind of battle of the sexes. It's simply talking about what has happened to some of us. If people are saying that it's about hating men or bashing men then that tends to keep us silent and it's important to talk about this issue. This is not a man vs. women issue or a man bashing issue.

My purpose for talking about it is that I hope others will simply realize this goes on and take some precautions. Don't trust. Don't give your personal information out.

Well, what kind of vibe do you get from this post?

https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/im-being-bullied-here.64222/page-2#post-1195249

The vibe I get that it's ok to say "Fuck off" to me and because I'm a man it "empowers" women. This is a direct example of hate against men.

 

[TheNorthernSilence]

I have no comment on whatever gripe you have with someone else or their posts.

Oh wow, you totally ignored the point I was making..

 

[Meditation guide]

I get the impression some are trying to stir up a lot of drama around this for some reason, or maybe I misunderstood the purpose of this thread. I assumed it was about what some of us have experienced from predatory behavior. If someone has implied or said all men are trash then that's wrong and they shouldn't have said it. I've read through the posts in this thread and do not see that mentioned by anyone but maybe a post was removed. Or maybe I missed it.

Someone here referred me with a link to a closed thread. I'm really not interested in whatever that was all about. If anyone has an issue with a post report it and let the mods handle it.

 

[TotallyIsolated]

So what do you want us to do concretely?
Because if 99% of decent men say
"it's terrible behaviour, they're horrible people"

I can assure you rapists won't give a fuck about it and will even find it amusing.
Like saying to a pedophile "don't rape kids, I can assure you it's really bad"
and then thinking it's going to change anything. WTF man.

Fuck that mentality of "all men are trash" really.
Please keep that shit in the US and the UK, thank you.

Its not as simple a matter of there being rapists and "decent men". Those who commit sexual assault are ordinary people, and there is a whole spectrum of misconduct that needs to be confronted. People like Harvey Weinstein get away with it because they have positions of power and authority. People who are friends, family members, or coworkers get away with it because we downplay its significance or just deny that its a problem. We all make excuses for abusers and try to claim that somehow nothing can be done about it. Instead we should be challenging it wherever we see it, and making it clear that this behaviour is not acceptable.

I accept that anyone can be the victim of abuse, but overwhelmingly sexual abuse and misconduct is perpetrated BY MEN against women. Thats just a fact, and to ignore or sidestep it misses the point.

 

[BornBrief]

Not all men, but ALL women.


So getting mad when people are speaking generally about the behaviours of men towards women is misplaced when it's the topic of discussion.

No one is talking about you if you're not part of the problem, but you become part of the problem when all you can focus on is how offended you get by something that apparently doesn't include you.

 

[Fragile]

Its not as simple a matter of there being rapists and "decent men". Those who commit sexual assault are ordinary people, and there is a whole spectrum of misconduct that needs to be confronted. People like Harvey Weinstein get away with it because they have positions of power and authority. People who are friends, family members, or coworkers get away with it because we downplay its significance or just deny that its a problem. We all make excuses for abusers and try to claim that somehow nothing can be done about it. Instead we should be challenging it wherever we see it, and making it clear that this behaviour is not acceptable.

I accept that anyone can be the victim of abuse, but overwhelmingly sexual abuse and misconduct is perpetrated BY MEN against women. Thats just a fact, and to ignore or sidestep it misses the point.

You must know a lot of rapists and covered for them, or maybe it's a cultural difference and the anglosphere is drowning in rapists by the way people talk about the situation.

No one is denying that women are the main group affected by this, it's a fact. Also, no one is saying that this is in any way a good behavior, I think all of us here agree that this is completely abhorrent.

But if instead of blaming the perpetrators you blame the entire group, then all you are doing is creating more issues and divisiveness, you are also excusing their disgusting behaviors by putting it into the rest and accepting it as something normal.

what's the point in trying to educate people if by default you'll think that they are inherently "garbage"?

 

[TotallyIsolated]

You must know a lot of rapists and covered for them, or maybe it's a cultural difference and the anglosphere is drowning in rapists by the way people talk about the situation.

No one is denying that women are the main group affected by this, it's a fact. Also, no one is saying that this is in any way a good behavior, I think all of us here agree that this is completely abhorrent.

But if instead of blaming the perpetrators you blame the entire group, then all you are doing is creating more issues and divisiveness, you are also excusing their disgusting behaviors by putting it into the rest and accepting it as something normal.

what's the point in trying to educate people if by default you'll think that they are inherently "garbage"?

You haven't responded to anything I said. Its clear that you've already made up your mind, and your just fixating on my "men are trash" remark, which by the way YOU added 'all' to.

I love how you're more upset about being insulted than about issue itself, just like the majority of us. I find it quite telling that when I point out that men can be shitty you take it personally.

Feel free to google "not all men" for a stock response to your post if you want one.

 

[Fragile]

You haven't responded to anything I said. Its clear that you've already made up your mind, and your just fixating on my "men are trash" remark, which by the way YOU added 'all' to.

I love how you're more upset about being insulted than about issue itself, just like the majority of us. I find it quite telling that when I point out that men can be shitty you take it personally.

Feel free to google "not all men" for a stock response to your post if you want one.

Not even upset or insulted, I'm just pointing out how shitty it is to blame this on an entire group of people instead of blaming the horrible individuals who do these kind of things. And I've already stated multiple times that I believe that this behavior is not ok while condemning it.
I'm actually being consistent since my first message on this thread was about not all members of this forum being monsters despite the fact that there are some abusers hiding among us.

Whatever, this is going nowhere and I'm not going to keep arguing with someone who preaches about men being garbage abusers and then thinks it's appropriate to comment this after OP opened up about her experience:

though wish I knew TessB IRL after seeing her profile pic!

But nice apology tho, almost feel like the ones that famous abusers use after they get caught.

 

[Life_and_Death]

Its clear that you've already made up your mind,

its at this point i roll my eyes and stop responding to people. like you said, they made up their mind, it doesnt matter whos right and whos wrong anymore because no ones listening. dont waste your breath, time or energy

 

[noname223]

I would advice the members of this forum to be careful. SS is a place for vulnerable people. No wonder there are predators. But the solution cannot be to fight this place. It is too important for many of us. It is a rare place where you can share your suicidal thoughts without being judged. You can barely find those forums. Be cautious if you talk to people, report them in case but don't deny the right that the forum should have to exist.

 

[loopylou]

Can't believe I missed this. I will certainly miss your posts? I can understand what you mean by creeps. I have had one inbox me asking for nudes then when I mentioned it in chat i got told I'm kind of asking for it because of my profile pictures. Warped ideas.