jatty
zero emotional regulation
- Nov 13, 2023
- 145
My emotions have no rhyme or rhythm. Ive been trying to die for a while but 8 hours before it happens suddenly i love my life. When i wake up the morning after, i regret it so much and i just wanted to die.
And my brain convinces itself that it doesnt need to die because i feel fine, but I LITERALLY logically know i ONLY feel fine because i feel like im going to die, because once my method is threatened i break down and panic.
I want to die but my emotions are doing everything just to prevent discomfort and pain with death. I loved living sure but i want to die, and its not as simple as "just dont die then", like i really want to but my body and emotions are never the same, im so tired of it everyday!!
And there are times in absolutely convinced i never even loved life!! Holy shit someone KILL ME!!!!!! I am so tired of being mentally ill. The worst part is that i can LOGICALLY SEE EVERYTHING BUT I AM STILL TIED DOWN LIKE IM IN A CAGE!
And my brain convinces itself that it doesnt need to die because i feel fine, but I LITERALLY logically know i ONLY feel fine because i feel like im going to die, because once my method is threatened i break down and panic.
I want to die but my emotions are doing everything just to prevent discomfort and pain with death. I loved living sure but i want to die, and its not as simple as "just dont die then", like i really want to but my body and emotions are never the same, im so tired of it everyday!!
And there are times in absolutely convinced i never even loved life!! Holy shit someone KILL ME!!!!!! I am so tired of being mentally ill. The worst part is that i can LOGICALLY SEE EVERYTHING BUT I AM STILL TIED DOWN LIKE IM IN A CAGE!
