I’m infatuated with drowning.

[VileMagnolia]

Drowning is the most convenient method that appeals to me. There is a bridge over water I can jump off of, but I don't know if it's high enough for the fall to knock me out, so I'd probably drown conscious whilst sinking into the deep end of the water which sounds terrifying because of thalassophobic feelings. The bridge is also very active so I'd feel very embarrassed to jump in front of quite a few cars most likely.

Currently I lean towards simply walking into the water at night and using a combination of hyperventilation and inhaling air duster to knock myself out and drown in shallow-ish water since drowning in deep water would be dreadful. I know drowning is very unpleasant, but it won't leave my mind. I want to be aware of my death while it's happening, and I cling to feeling that after a few minutes of pain, there would be a final feeling of knowing peace in the last moments of this lifetime.

 

[U. A.]

People tend to describe surviving near-drownings in ways such as feeling like their lungs were exploding.
Don't romanticise this.

 

[madameviolette]

That would burn your lungs like hell. If you can tolerate it. But then idk how someone would fight that without instinctively going to the surface for air