bluegodism
the rose is blue 🌹💙
- Nov 26, 2023
- 119
I'm going to kill myself in less than a month. I want to tell a little about my story, I don't know why but I want to. thank you to everyone who will read. sorry for the text maybe too long.
my name will not be revealed, but I will call myself blue for now. us, actually. we are a traumagenic system. we came across this forum through research about hanging yourself with a belt from the door. we browsed it a little and came across the SN method. we didn't even read it on the first day, we thought it would be very difficult. well, If you are brazilian it is the simplest thing.so SN is our method of choice.
I've been suicidal since I was 8 years old if I remember correctly. I was a silly child, I held my breath believing I was going to die. despite the date being 8 years old, I remember well a day when I was about 4/5 years old when I really wanted to become a little star (die in child language).
I am autistic support level 1, ADHD, have generalized anxiety, traits of narcissism and possible DID. I suffered trauma that I don't remember as a child, but I have some flashbacks of horrible scenes of bullying at school.
I have chronic pain from fibromyalgia that makes me want to die even more. I have been dealing with these pains since 2021.
I've been to several psychologists and psychiatrists. I have tried several medications. nothing worked.
I have some close friends and others not so much. they help me a lot, they make me comfortable. I suffered a lot with friendships in the past. I'm so grateful to have them in my life, but I can't go on for them.
I've already tried to kill myself 5 times. with pills, all. the last one was the 14th of last month. this time it will work out with SN, I'm sure.
I think that's it, thanks to whoever read it.
my name will not be revealed, but I will call myself blue for now. us, actually. we are a traumagenic system. we came across this forum through research about hanging yourself with a belt from the door. we browsed it a little and came across the SN method. we didn't even read it on the first day, we thought it would be very difficult. well, If you are brazilian it is the simplest thing.so SN is our method of choice.
I've been suicidal since I was 8 years old if I remember correctly. I was a silly child, I held my breath believing I was going to die. despite the date being 8 years old, I remember well a day when I was about 4/5 years old when I really wanted to become a little star (die in child language).
I am autistic support level 1, ADHD, have generalized anxiety, traits of narcissism and possible DID. I suffered trauma that I don't remember as a child, but I have some flashbacks of horrible scenes of bullying at school.
I have chronic pain from fibromyalgia that makes me want to die even more. I have been dealing with these pains since 2021.
I've been to several psychologists and psychiatrists. I have tried several medications. nothing worked.
I have some close friends and others not so much. they help me a lot, they make me comfortable. I suffered a lot with friendships in the past. I'm so grateful to have them in my life, but I can't go on for them.
I've already tried to kill myself 5 times. with pills, all. the last one was the 14th of last month. this time it will work out with SN, I'm sure.
I think that's it, thanks to whoever read it.
