How to overcome survival instinct?

[ScorpiusDragon]

I feel like I'm getting closer to suicide each day. I just can't imagine living to my old age. If anything, I feel like I need to do it. That it's the only right thing to do.
Knowing me though, I don't think I could go through with the gorier methods, like jumping out of a building or shooting myself. I just don't think I have the guts actually to carry out those types of methods, though I fantasize about them a lot.
If I ever go through with it, I can see myself drinking SN or N, using CO poisoning, or inhaling helium or nitrogen gas. But even those methods require overcoming my survival instinct. I recently ordered N from A, and I'm trying to imagine myself holding a couple of bottles of N. I'm not worried about the taste, but I am worried about the brief period of time between drinking the N and the time I lose consciousness. Those moments will prob be the most terror-filled moments of my brief existence...being sharply aware that it's only a matter of time before I pass into nothingness....

 

[lululoo]

I think there may be a very brief time of terror after drinking, but the N will make you sleepy so quickly that it will turn peaceful. At least that is how I imagine it. I'm more worried about taking the step of drinking.

I feel like I need to do it too. But yeah, it's still hard to deal with the fear.

 

[Life+me=error]

Those moments will prob be the most terror-filled moments of my brief existence...

Maybe it's not time for you to go?!

I think once you made peace with death the moments after drinking N will be wonderful especially after a shot of hard liquor.

In that moment, try to remember that death isn't that bad. I mean you won't be aware of nothingness. You won't know you are dead or non existing.