How many parents do we have here?

[Feline]

Having children is the worst thing I can think of. So, no.

 

[Bloodtearsdust]

Have you told whoever prescribed your antidepressants that it makes it worse?? That's a sign you're not on the right ones, if you've been taking them for a while now.
You're strong for choosing to stay alive and for facing these struggles and working on them for your children. I'm sorry it's proving to be a very difficult thing for you, and I wish you the best. I hope something works for you to live a life in peace with yourself for you and your kids.

Oh definitely. I've been on quite a few different trials..my doctor is aware.. I feel like they should extend their black box warning to adults. I've talked with others whom have the same issues. Adults I feel are less likely to report it maybe.. for fear of the consequences. (Psychiatric hospitals etc). The moment you say the word suicide it's like saying the word bomb in an airport. Hopefully one day I can find a class of meds that will work.

 

[DrownedOctopus]

Oh definitely. I've been on quite a few different trials..my doctor is aware.. I feel like they should extend their black box warning to adults. I've talked with others whom have the same issues. Adults I feel are less likely to report it maybe.. for fear of the consequences. (Psychiatric hospitals etc). The moment you say the word suicide it's like saying the word bomb in an airport. Hopefully one day I can find a class of meds that will work.

I agree. I don't think anybody wants to be involuntarily admitted because their meds aren't quite right and they're having a negative side effect.
It's unfortunate that that fear might be what is keeping anyone from getting better help.

 

[Lara Francis]

I admire and wish i shared your strength @Bloodtearsdust.

 

[seekingoblivion]

Yes!!! I feel the same way and you are right drinking does help a little. I wish I actually liked alcohol lol. I'm sitting in the middle of the woods right now alone. I love it here. Just sitting on a log. Peace and quiet. :)

That sounds really peaceful. I'd love to spend some time in the woods with just one other person there.

 

[esclava]

I'm a mother. Years ago my former therapist called the cops on me and cps took my kids due to "predictive neglect". This means they can take your kids without proof of any abuse. I fought for a year and got them back, jumping through all the required hoops (inpatient care, meds) and then some. I honestly just wish my husband would sign off on placing them up for adoption. It requires both parents to sign where I live. I never wanted children, and my husband prevented me from getting an abortion.

I love my children, but it's beyond exhausting caring for them mostly on my own (the husband really only wanted them as a status symbol). I just want them to have a better life being cared for by someone who is sure to be there to see them grow up.

 

[hegesias]

I am a mother.
The worst part for me is knowing when I ctb she may grow up and feel like I abandoned her. I did my best to prevent getting pregnant because of my suicidal tendencies, and it terrified me when I found out I was. Sometimes I feel suffocatingly stuck and even more forced into living a life I never asked for, and other times I don't care who it hurts if I ctb.
Don't get me wrong, I love her more than anything and want the absolute best for her..I just firmly believe I am not what is best for her. She definitely deserves more than I could ever hope to give her, and I feel I cheated her out of everything she could have had by choosing to keep her instead of giving her up for adoption. I stupidly thought after she was born I would be okay enough to raise her and be what she needs, and for a short while it seemed that was true. But it was inevitable for me to go right back to feeling this way, I just was too blinded by mommy-hormones to see it.

Why didnt you abort?

 

[DrownedOctopus]

Why didnt you abort?

Because for me it wasn't an option.
I may want to end my own life, but I don't feel like I should get a say in ending someone else's. When I found out I was pregnant I was already far enough along to know she was a girl. She was a person to me at that point.
I'm not going to get into a debate about abortions, though, so I hope you're not looking for one. I think every woman should have the right to a say with their own body. For me, it just isn't something I could consciously do and be okay with.

 

[FTL.Wanderer]

it's also a terrible thing with grown kids that don't care

Thank you for this very important addition. We always hear, "But what about the kids?!!!" No one talks about the exploding elderly population internationally abandoned by those same kids who couldn't be bothered to visit elderly parents rotting in nursing homes or worse even once a year. It's so bad often that China in the past few years passed a law requiring adult children to visit their elderly parents--many who end up living in garages or dilapidated shacks and dying from dereliction. But if they'd, decades earlier, confessed they wanted to ctb, they'd have heard, "But what about your kids?! They love and neeeed you!"

Having children is the worst thing I can think of. So, no.

Not to mention the hellish risk, given the mushrooming rates of depression and suicide worldwide, of bringing consciousness into existence to experience not just the stresses of modern life but also the increasing probability of ... depression and suicidal ideation.

 

[HelpPlease]

I am a parent and didn't want to be. I wasn't mentally able and no I am very sick and suffering and she needs me and I am destroyed by drugs. Some by drs some not. So I am the biggest piece of shit ever and I want to die bc I am in so much pain all the time

 

[Istanbulite]

Don't get them. If you're suicidal you do not procreate. Full stop. Very selfish.

 

[Depressed Cat]

I'm an antinatalist myself and won't be having biological kids of my own, but I will never judge suicidal parents.

Suicidality can develop anytime in life. It's not as if suicidal parents deliberately brought kids into this world despite knowing that they're going to commit suicide. It's not fair to judge a suicidal parent at all!

 

[Istanbulite]

It's not as if suicidal parents deliberately brought kids into this world despite knowing that they're going to commit suicide.

Some do. To heal themselves.