N
noname223
Angelic
- Aug 18, 2020
- 4,995
I don't have much experience on it. But I can remember one incident. When I was a child I was with my family in a swimming bath. There was a special day everyone had like swimming little boats with them. They were not exactly boats, rather syntethic material with which they could swim on water. But you can imagine them as little boats. Sorry I cannot describe it better but it is not that important. Yeah I dove under water because I always liked to do that. But it was not that smart to do it this day. The surface was full of these boats/ synthetic plastic and for me it was almost impossible to resurface. I can remember I could not breath and I panicked. For some seconds I was without air and it felt pretty bad. My mom realized after some time what was happpening. She saved me.
I was not that close to dying but it was scary. I cried a long time afterwards because I was kind of shocked. I think drowning is a horrible death.
Though retrospectively I wish I would have died at this day. Personally I wish an accident would kill me. I would even take it if it was painful. Suicide is for me so horrible inter alia because I have to do it by my own. I am so scared to screw up my life even more. I hate the responsibilty and the pressure that comes with this decision.
I was not that close to dying but it was scary. I cried a long time afterwards because I was kind of shocked. I think drowning is a horrible death.
Though retrospectively I wish I would have died at this day. Personally I wish an accident would kill me. I would even take it if it was painful. Suicide is for me so horrible inter alia because I have to do it by my own. I am so scared to screw up my life even more. I hate the responsibilty and the pressure that comes with this decision.