Got my SN taken away by the police

[nitrogenous]

I fucking hate my life. Got confidentiality broken on me again but instead of the ambulance, the police came and they took my SN away. It was very unexpected as I didn't know anyone was coming to my house and didn't have any indications that I would have confidentiality broken. At first, they wouldn't even fucking tell me who called them. When the police arrive, they bribed me that if I give the SN to them they'd send me to another hospital other than the one that I've always been to previously as that hospital is useless as fuck, if any they always make me more suicidal afterwards. It's filled with people who have no compassion or empathy at all. I really regret giving the SN to the police, I'm such an idiot. I wasn't sure if they have rights to take it out of me if I didn't comply and I know I probably had no chance of running away as they were packed with tasers etc on them. I got discharged roughly 6 hours after getting to this other hospital and it was definitely better than the usual hospital, but still got told "you can kill yourself tomorrow if you want to, it's your life" "you're so young, you don't know anything" "we can't help with anything but you can get through this". Really considering reordering the sodium nitrite at this point cause I really don't have anything to lose ugh. I don't know if that's wise of me to order it now though, or if I should wait for another mental health episode/when I'm in desperation. Wish I had taken the SN before they came fuck this. My medical team will fucking blame me for this because they really hate me getting care outside of them and even told me to fake my suicidality to everyone else.

 

[rkk3]

are you in usa where was this

 

[blush]

wow, that sounds unbelievable. "you can kys tmr if you want to"? i'm so sorry you experienced this

 

[Liebestod]

I know how you feel, I got my gun taken away from me by the police.

 

[Alek1=]

wow, that sounds unbelievable. "you can kys tmr if you want to"? i'm so sorry you experienced this

They are at least honest, it;s your life and it;s your choice afterall. Wonder if there's a context to it or they just straight up say shit like this to suicidal people.

 

[nitrogenous]

are you in usa where was this

Australia

wow, that sounds unbelievable. "you can kys tmr if you want to"? i'm so sorry you experienced this

Lowkey that made me wanna kms even more, but I couldn't cuz my SN isn't here anymore, I felt like I should have fought the police to not give it to them. I feel like I could probably talk my way out of it somehow if I wasn't so stressed with the sudden police encounter

I know how you feel, I got my gun taken away from me by the police.

I'm sorry you had a similar situation. It's so devastating, like I understand they have a duty of care and what not but on the other hand, there's no solution to "fixing" our problems or suicidality. So taking the means away in my opinion just makes things worse.

They are at least honest, it;s your life and it;s your choice afterall. Wonder if there's a context to it or they just straight up say shit like this to suicidal people.

Well, yeah. My medical team (GP, psychiatrist) always say the same thing. If I talk about my situation (practical problems) and how I feel hopeless about it, they would just say "I don't know what to do" "I don't know how to help". Even with physical problems like issues with eating (swallowing), I got told "you just have to solve that, otherwise we are taking the meds off you (cause one of the meds can cause weight loss)". If they ask me "how are you going to solve this then? How are you going to survive?" And I reply with "I don't know, I feel so hopeless, the only way out is to die" they then would say "well it's your choice, you're an adult". I got told previously too "I can't help you if you kill yourself after this session" "If you kill yourself, I won't go to the other side just to help you". The system is so fucked up honestly..