Venting General thread for my vents about wanting to die

[FuneralCry]

Just wish I had a painless way.
I truly do just wish I had a painless way, I wish I had a painless way to permanently escape from all future unnecessary suffering in this existence I never would have chose in the first place that just caused me to suffer so much. It just feels so cruel to me how I cannot just die in peace, in an existence so torturous and painful where there is no limit as to how much agony one can feel death truly would be the only relief for me. I only hope and wish for non-existence where all is forgotten about for me and I finally cannot suffer anymore, I see nothing desirable about prolonging the suffering much as possible just to end up tortured and tormented by old age.

I'd never wish for such which is why I suffer so much from how I cannot just die painlessly, I also find it so horrific how trying to die can go wrong and lead to way worse torment, such happening is exactly what I fear, in fact I fear ending up in a situation of way worse suffering in general. Personally I just want the true peace of non-existence over all this cruelty and torment which to me serves no purpose but to torture existing beings all for the sake of it, I just want to painlessly escape from suffering. To me personally human existence has always been something so undesirable, it just feels like a mistake to me that just brings so much pain, I truly was never meant for existing, I'm always so tired of suffering in this cruel existence, I just hope and wish to never wake again.

 

[FuneralCry]

Existence to me is such a cruel imposition.
I'll personally always find existence to be such a cruel, painful imposition and I see it as a tragedy how I was forced into this existence in the first place where I suffer so unnecessarily just hoping and wishing to be gone, I just find existing to be so undesirable in general. It just creates pain and problems there was never a need for tormenting existing beings until they die anyway in existences so futile, I'm always so tired of suffering in this existence and I find it so painful how I was forced into existence, to me existence truly is a burden that was imposed and it's one I never would have chosen or wished for.

I truly was never meant for the cruel, painful imposistion that is existence but rather I'm only meant for non-existence, in my case non-existence really is all I hope and wish for, I'd never wish for something as incredibly cruel as existence where there is no limit as to how much one can be tormented all while they are destined for nothing but to decay from age and die anyway. I wish I never was forced into existence especially as there are no disadvantages to never suffering at all, I'd always prefer to not exist but more than anything I wish I never suffered, I wish this existence was never imposed as to me existence truly is the most horrific, terrible tragedy that just caused endless amounts of suffering, there really is too much cruelty in existing and it's such that only death can bring me peace from.

 

[FuneralCry]

Always just hoping for permanent sleep.
No matter what permanent sleep truly is all I'll wish for, personally I've only ever found comfort in death as I believe it to simply be nothingness where all is finally forgotten about for me and I cannot suffer in any way, all I hope for is to never suffer again, I've suffered so much for so long and I'm always so tired of it.

I just wish for an dreamless, eternal sleep to take all my suffering away and bring me peace from this existence I never would have chose, I find existing to be so cruel, painful and just undesirable in general. I've never wished for existence and I was never meant for it either, permanent eternal sleep just sounds so peaceful to me, I just hope to never wake again where all is gone for me and I'm at peace instead of suffering so unnecessarily in this existence just hoping and wishing to be gone.

I'll always find it a burden to be conscious in this existence and have to experience anything at all, personally all I've ever hoped for is non-existence, I'll only be at peace once I'm finally asleep for all eternity. I'd never wish for the cruelty and torment of suffering in this existence rather I'd prefer to avoid such no matter what, the only relief for me could lie in eternal sleep where I'm finally unable to suffer, it brings me so much pain how I cannot just have a death like never waking again, I only hope to never wake.