Fucking burned out.

[Jadedmeursault9]

It's not even a self worth thing but like in the span of 2 weeks alone I've had

-a cat die
-band members threaten to quit
-booking issues with a venue that lasted back and forth until the point where I had to move the venue the day before the show
-bassist took a leave of absence (he did give like a 4 month notice tho)
-shows where band members couldn't make it and had to find fill ins
-bands drop out of bill and me having to figure that shit out
-at least 3 arguments with my gf
-money issues
-work scheduling issues
-an infected toe that I haven't been able to fix yet
-the heat has scorched half my plants in my garden, which is the only thing outside of music that makes me happy
-constant struggles not to break my sobriety and not drink
-work scheduling issues around all this
-run ins with old friends that made me feel worse

It's just too fucking much man I'm like having anxiety induced panic attacks every day.

Not really suicidal per-se but the allure of it all being over is pretty fucking strong.

 

[timf]

It sounds like a lot of activity. Circumstances can combine to stress out a day. Do you have anything that can give you a sort of "safe harbor". Sometimes a favorite book, movie, or TV show can be a way to sort of recharge one's "batteries".