burninghill
Student
- Dec 2, 2025
- 175
Nothing crazy, actually.
My CTB date is April 25th, tomorrow will be April 17th and I'm going on my first ever solo trip.
I don't have many things on my radar, ironically I'm desperate to go on this very large suspension bridge and chill out at a cafe. I'll also be going to the club.
I was going to bring some DXM to do while I'm there, but I'm not sure. I am bringing the DXM but chances are I won't use it.
Part of me hopes that something terrible happens. I've marked out potential CTB locations there so… in the case that something drastic occurs then I have a way out. It wouldn't be terrible really, it's part of the reason why I'm going to a club alone. Maybe I'll get pushed over the edge.
But yeah anyway… I'm going to a house party on the 19th, meeting up with all my friends for my birthday on the 22nd, then celebrating my birthday on the 23rd. I don't even know how I feel about my suicide anymore, I don't feel much for anything. I just never want to feel terrible again.
Today my mum told me that I make her proud of her younger self and she's glad she has me and her sister because she'd go insane without us. I'm not sure if something is making her say more sentimental things than normal, or if you just notice them more when you know you're going to die.
My CTB date is April 25th, tomorrow will be April 17th and I'm going on my first ever solo trip.
I don't have many things on my radar, ironically I'm desperate to go on this very large suspension bridge and chill out at a cafe. I'll also be going to the club.
I was going to bring some DXM to do while I'm there, but I'm not sure. I am bringing the DXM but chances are I won't use it.
Part of me hopes that something terrible happens. I've marked out potential CTB locations there so… in the case that something drastic occurs then I have a way out. It wouldn't be terrible really, it's part of the reason why I'm going to a club alone. Maybe I'll get pushed over the edge.
But yeah anyway… I'm going to a house party on the 19th, meeting up with all my friends for my birthday on the 22nd, then celebrating my birthday on the 23rd. I don't even know how I feel about my suicide anymore, I don't feel much for anything. I just never want to feel terrible again.
Today my mum told me that I make her proud of her younger self and she's glad she has me and her sister because she'd go insane without us. I'm not sure if something is making her say more sentimental things than normal, or if you just notice them more when you know you're going to die.
