"try to remmber that a lot of the times the rejections have a lot to do with external factors that have nothing to do with you"
I mean, a little bit of column A and a little bit of column B. The job market is fucked and I have a piece of trash degree. But even my friends with legitimately good credentials are struggling so I don't hold out much hope for myself.
"wouldnt have worked anyways, you are not looking for just any woman and even 100 likes in a inbox means nothing. you are looking for the one who will like you for you."
Yeah but don't you think finding the one woman would be more expedient if I had 100 opportunities instead of zero?
"saying there is no chance based on past experince is a broad generlization."
Saying the sun will come up tomorrow is a broad generalization. Sure, it's come up a billion times before, but there's always tomorrow!
"someone is out there who is meant for you and it will happen when you least expect it"
Until that one person gets bored and leaves, maybe.
I don't mean to be overly aggro for no reason, but I'm just saying my life circumstances don't inspire hope. Some of it's my fault, some of it is not my fault. You're right there for sure, but also both me and the things surrounding me make up the texture of my life and neither are looking so
Regarding the first part: Ofcurse it's a combination of a lot of things that directly do with you and those that don't
but what I'm saying is offer yourself some grace don't be so hard on yourself as if you are solely responsible using it to fuel self hatered and doom pattern of thinking
It's ok to not hold hope but giving up is a whole other thing. It's a numbers game
What you said about your friends if anything it's proving that you may have hard time even if you had better credentials it's just showing that many people struggle and you shouldn't focus on your and be mad about your "piece of tresh degree" compared too..
Keep trying
About the second part: yeah no shit if you had 100 matches you would have better chance at finding someone
But it's love.. there are people who switch partner every week and it means nothing anymore and there are people who got married to the first person they dated
We don't have equal starting point due to looks status wealth etc but this is how the world works. You can say it would have been easier if I had 100 matches or you just accept that you have 0 and still not give up
Third everywhere I went I was a isolated loner yeah I had "friends" but they weren't really friends.. I never really got close to anyone or was invited anywhere and I spent my high school escaping to computer games becuse I hated myself and had bad environment (technically) I met 1000s of women through school army some of them were friends some thought I was a complete loser it flantuates I would always get rejected and I asked a lot at best I'd get dropped after 2-3 dates "you are a great guy but"⦠I'd pay for everything I'd drive long times to see them everything I could based on that I myself reached the conclusion that I'm fundamentally unloveable low status zero, I convinced myself I'll die alone as you wrote no one will stay for me when everyone can get better than me and stuff it's the only logical conclusion after so many years of humaliation and I truly understand it
But then I met my gf and it wasn't some sort of a compermise or anything she's more beautiful inside and out than any of woman I asked out and was interested before I was convinced from day 1 she's too good for me and there's a catch..
nope⦠she proved to me that alllll my past rejections all the times I've been hurt none of it matters
Your broad generalization can be true for all your lifeā¦ā¦ā¦. Until one day someone comes and breaks it on your faceā¦
And yeah part of me still thinks im boring and she will leave but every day we choose each other and even if one day she will leave I know I'll be ok just like I was with all the rejections before her⦠if anything it's a strength⦠look around you at all the couples do you think they were not dropped many times before by other people? You just keep going becuse you need only one match
Yeah your life don't inspire hope I understand it but you just keep going becuse stopping is not an option
If I had said nah it's hopeless and not began trying to talk with my girl we would forever be two strangers
And I wouldnt meet that amazing person
You can be down, you can aknowlage you are at the bottom but you never know when the tides will turn and you will start rising
I don't know if you read this far and I doubt it but I wouldn't invest and write this much if I didn't care about you maybe I identify someone who's going through similar pains to mine
I truly wish you will find friends who like you (I still struggle with it myself) a gf, a good job
That one day you will look back and laugh and most importantly the strength to give yourself slack and compassion