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Elementalist
Nov 11, 2020
885
I've pretty much come to the conclusion that therapy won't help me.

It's up to whether meds help me enough or not. Still waiting on results... But even if I get better idk if I want to live life.

I mean we all die eventually and there are way more bad times then good for me at least.

This is making me kind of give up on recovering.

Though I haven't died yet because I'm just scared of the pain I'll bring my parents, family dogs, brother, and the uncertainty of what happens after death. I'm scared of being alone.

When I die will I be able to see my parents/dogs/brother again? Will it be a void where nothing matters as I'm not conscious so I wouldn't know the difference? Is it reincarnation? Etc etc...

I also don't have a relatively peaceful or instant/quick way to die.

If I could press a button and instantly die I'd be gone though. I'm not even at the worse I've been and I feel just done. Completely exhausted with life.
 
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