JinZhin
we are in hell
- Nov 2, 2021
- 187
I'm 21, so I'm somewhat close to your age. I think I first planned on dying when I was 10 and I wanted to pick some arbitrary number of years to count down on.
In my mind I wouldn't really mind living past being 30 or so, but I'm afraid it just won't work out, I just won't do anything and I always wanted to give up anyways, it could have been better, but I just don't have it in me.
If life only gets worse, I'm only left with waiting for it to beat me even more, therefore it's better to go now while I feel like I still haven't lost 'everything' whtever that may be.
In my mind I wouldn't really mind living past being 30 or so, but I'm afraid it just won't work out, I just won't do anything and I always wanted to give up anyways, it could have been better, but I just don't have it in me.
If life only gets worse, I'm only left with waiting for it to beat me even more, therefore it's better to go now while I feel like I still haven't lost 'everything' whtever that may be.
