Catching the bus tonight

[Emily123]

 

[jgm63]

I think it's important to add to SN threads that 'chile saltpeter' is no good

Don't forget to cancel those ;)

Good spot. Mentioned to OP and apparently she cancelled already....

 

[youonlydieonce]

Wishing you a peaceful journey

 

[NeCkDeEp]

Found this here - https://accessmedicine.mhmedical.com/content.aspx?bookid=391&sectionid=42069927

It says that nitrates can cause hypotension at low doses, but massive doses are required to produce methemoglobinemia. But what is a massive dose?

Yeah I'm not willing to try this one again as it's hard to guess what a massive dose will be.

@NeCkDeEp I've never directly chatted to you, but I've always appreciated your input to the discussions etc on the thread. It's clear from the responses here that you're highly valued by many other users too.

I can't even imagine how you're feeling and I'm so sorry that you had to endure this experience. As other members have said, when the time comes we will still be here. I hope you're okay.

Thank you so much I really appreciate your kind words and wish you nothing but the best.

Hi OP, just read your unfortunate adventure from last night.

I really hope you weren't in too much pain or discomfort because of the nitrate you took and that you're okay right now. We're here to support you emotionally whatever you choose to do next, I really hope you'll find the peace you're looking for ASAP. :)

The pain wasn't too bad thank you for checking in, thank you so much I hope that I'll be able to do another attempt upcoming week.

I think it's important to add to SN threads that 'chile saltpeter' is no good

Don't forget to cancel those ;)

Yeah I should have done my research about that as well fuck, if you type it in Google then you will already see that it's nano3.

I did last night after I realised that I probably wouldn't die, thank you.

Honestly, there is no pressure from us, please do not feel rushed. I'd rather you didn't take it, I just hope that you're OK that must have been an emotional roller-coaster for you.

Thank you so much It's just me who wants it to be all over soon, I'm ready to go and there's nothing else I want. Hopefully soon, very soon.

I think its important to notice that a quick online search of "chile saltpeter" would have shown that it is just another name for sodium nitrate. But if the seller said it was sodium nitrite, then they are to blame of course. We must put in enough effort to do our own personal research. We are the person that will suffer if we don't.

Yeah I can send you the link of the seller in pm?? It's a scam with the wrong information on eBay and on the other hand: I should have looked chile saltpeter up before drinking it, saltpeter is nano 3.

@NeCkDeEp sweetie, I'm sorry you got the Wrong Stuff, and admire you hugely for taking it in stride - you're so intrepid! (((Hug of Admiration))) After your nuggets please get a good long sleep. Drink plenty of water over the next few days and be gentle with yourself, dear amazing @NeCkDeEp x

Thank you so much for your kind words, I will definitely get some nuggets tonight and some lasagne with dr pepper.

Ditto. Sorry you went thru this. Hope you are okay until the next attempt. A test on a drop of blood with the next order seems like a good idea.

I tried to get my blood in a mug last night but lol I'm too dumb to figure out how.

Sorry you got scamed.
Can you pm me from which seller did you order this?

Sure give me a few mins.

I hope you're ok, in the means that whatever it was what you took didn't cause bad sides.
I would search something made in a factory with actually official labels.
That powder with a homemade paper who says 'sodium nitrate' even if the seller swear it is SN or the 'label' spelled correctly it is not to trust at all, even if it was simply caffeine what you were looking for.

Thank you. Yeah I still feel like shit because I really hoped that my attempt would have been succesful.
The pain wasn't too bad, only like a kind of burn feeling in my stomach, that's all.
Yeah I will do some better research the next time to hopefully avoid this dissapointment.

It's not a failure. You did what you thought was proper. No worries! We'll be here again if you decide this is still your decision and even if not. xo

I will hopefully be able to do another attempt upcoming week, thank you!

I have tears in my eyes from reading your post. Though we've never met, it makes me so sad to know it hurts you to be alive. That is so kind of you to care about those you are leaving behind and your pets. From what I can tell, you really are a decent human being. May you have rest for your soul.

You're almost making me cry, thank you so much. I've tried my best to leave my loved ones behind with something to look back at, and tried my best as well to get my pets in to the best as possible situation for them.
Once again, thank you so much!

safe travels and good luckk!

Thank you!! Hopefully soooon.

Wishing you a peaceful journey

Thank you!!

 

[youonlydieonce]

Oh NeCkDeEp, I just read what happened! Sending big hugs to you, and well done for taking it in your stride

 

[Deleted member 1465]

Poor girl. You must my feel awful. my sympathies.

 

[NeCkDeEp]

Guys! Just to update y'all: I have received SN in the mailbox today, I will ctb tomorrow evening (10 pm UK time) attempt 2.
I need to take my cat first to the vet tomorrow for her treatment (possibly cat acne or she's allergic to something.)
I know one member who used the SN I have right now and she didn't come back, so I really hope that I will succeed tomorrow gosh

 

[Moony21]

I wish you good luck this time and safe travels.

 

[LegaliseIt!]

Hugs. You will be missed.

 

[jgm63]

Guys! Just to update y'all: I have received SN in the mailbox today, I will ctb tomorrow evening (10 pm UK time) attempt 2.
I need to take my cat first to the vet tomorrow for her treatment (possibly cat acne or she's allergic to something.)
I know one member who used the SN I have right now and she didn't come back, so I really hope that I will succeed tomorrow gosh

Perhaps you could create a new goodbye thread tomorrow ? (if you want, that is....)

 

[MeltingHeart]

Guys! Just to update y'all: I have received SN in the mailbox today, I will ctb tomorrow evening (10 pm UK time) attempt 2.
I need to take my cat first to the vet tomorrow for her treatment (possibly cat acne or she's allergic to something.)
I know one member who used the SN I have right now and she didn't come back, so I really hope that I will succeed tomorrow gosh

Which user was that may I ask? I just want to double check my protocol
With some previous.

 

[NeCkDeEp]

I wish you good luck this time and safe travels.

Thank you! Let's hope that this attempt will be succesful tomorrow.

Hugs. You will be missed.

Hugs back!!

Perhaps you could create a new goodbye thread tomorrow ? (if you want, that is....)

I prefer to keep posting in here tbh, I don't feel like writing again emotional shit.

Which user was that may I ask? I just want to double check my protocol
With some previous.

I'll send you her username in pm.

 

[The nerd]

Good luck. Hope mine goes well too.

 

[R_N]

Hope everything goes how you want it this time. Good luck.

 

[Ark]

I hope you find the peace you deserve no matter how my friend. I will be here for you when the time comes if I can.

 

[Shivani]

Hope you find your peace. Wishing you strength

 

[PetiteAngel]

I hope you find the peace you crave sweet Angel. I shall miss you

 

[LMLN]

Peace and love to you. We will miss you. ❤❤❤

 

[Peeb]

Peace be with you!

 

[jgm63]

Thank you! Let's hope that this attempt will be succesful tomorrow.

Hugs back!!

I prefer to keep posting in here tbh, I don't feel like writing again emotional shit.

I'll send you her username in pm.

Ok, well in that case, keep us updated here....

 

[NeCkDeEp]

Good luck. Hope mine goes well too.

Thanks. I hope that your attempt will go well.

Hope everything goes how you want it this time. Good luck.

I hope so!! Thank you.

I hope you find the peace you deserve no matter how my friend. I will be here for you when the time comes if I can.

I really appreciate this thank you so much.

Hope you find your peace. Wishing you strength

Thank you! I'm excited but also exhausted because I've slept for 14 hours.

I hope you find the peace you crave sweet Angel. I shall miss you

Thank you so much, I really hope that you will find the peace you are looking for asap as well.

Peace and love to you. We will miss you. ❤❤❤

Thank you! I will miss you all as well, there are no words for how grateful I am for all the support here.

Peace be with you! ❤❤

Thank you!

It's seriously so unreal to do tonight another attempt I thought that it was gonna take much longer however I really want to ctb, I slept like an angel (14 hours) and I'm ready to spread my wings tonight.
I need to clean and tidy my apartment, taking my cat to the vet, buy some treats for my pets and that's all..
I will in the meantime besides eating lasagne v v very important check all the good bye letters, order a hoodie with a double chin angle of me for my closest friend this can hopefully make her laugh and just listen to my fave music until it's time to take meds and SN

 

[Lotus1818]

Thanks. I hope that your attempt will go well.

I hope so!! Thank you.

I really appreciate this thank you so much.

Thank you! I'm excited but also exhausted because I've slept for 14 hours.

Thank you so much, I really hope that you will find the peace you are looking for asap as well.

Thank you! I will miss you all as well, there are no words for how grateful I am for all the support here.

Thank you!

It's seriously so unreal to do tonight another attempt I thought that it was gonna take much longer however I really want to ctb, I slept like an angel (14 hours) and I'm ready to spread my wings tonight.
I need to clean and tidy my apartment, taking my cat to the vet, buy some treats for my pets and that's all..
I will in the meantime besides eating lasagne v v very important check all the good bye letters, order a hoodie with a double chin angle of me for my closest friend this can hopefully make her laugh and just listen to my fave music until it's time to take meds and SN

Good luck neckdeep I know you wanted this for a long time. Ik wens je veel rust

 

[domedune]

Good luck. Wishing you safety and rest

 

[TheLastGoodbye]

I'm sorry life has brought you to this point. I hope you find the peace you are looking for. Sleep well.

 

[BPD_LE]

I hope you get what you wish for this time. Your humour in the face of adversity is something I can relate too. Will be thinking of you ❤

 

[Moon Flower]

Rest easy, friend <3

 

[NeCkDeEp]

Good luck neckdeep I know you wanted this for a long time. Ik wens je veel rust

Thank you! Ik hoop echt dat het gaat lukken deze keer haha jezus, ik hoop dat wat je ook kiest of het nou herstel of ctb is: dat je geluk of rust vindt!

Good luck. Wishing you safety and rest

Thank you so much!

I'm sorry life has brought you to this point. I hope you find the peace you are looking for. Sleep well.

Don't worry, it's okay. Thank you so much.

I hope you get what you wish for this time. Your humour in the face of adversity is something I can relate too. Will be thinking of you ❤

I really appreciate this thank you! I'm still brainstorming about some other things to order for my closest friend, I think that it would be also nice for her if she has a pillow with my ugliest angles but I don't know or that will be too much of me?
I mean, she told me that if I would ctb that she will get a tattoo dedicated to me (she thought about that because she knows that this moment is coming, again) ah is it gonna be toooo much???

Rest easy, friend <3

Thank you!

 

[The nerd]

Are you going to chronicle the events? Just curious as mine will be tomorrow more likely than not.

 

[NeCkDeEp]

Are you going to chronicle the events? Just curious as mine will be tomorrow more likely than not.

I did with my first attempt yeah and I will do it again to avoid that I'll feel lonely or text friends and snitch myself.
I hope that your attempt goes well tomorrow! Hope you find the peace you are looking for.
Are you gonna take SN tomorrow?

 

[The nerd]

I did with my first attempt yeah and I will do it again to avoid that I'll feel lonely or text friends and snitch myself.
I hope that your attempt goes well tomorrow! Hope you find the peace you are looking for.
Are you gonna take SN tomorrow?

Yes I am. I have the SN but need generic over the counter stuff to counteract the side effects like vomiting. I am hoping it is as peaceful as some have mentioned. It scares me the other stories. I don't want to survive it. I want my light snuffed out. I recently lost my job and will be leaving behind a great woman and two kids I love more than anything, but I have no choice.