Discussion Can you have fun?

[therhydler]

Everybody on these big family gatherings does not have fun. They only react as if they are having fun. If you are really excited and happy about it - then your life definitely sux. Holidays are not something to be hated so much, but not a big deal at all. Life /or at least acts and results/ keep going on after christmas and new year.

I used to have fun on family gatherings because I have a really great family that I love and we would always joke around and I would laugh till my belly hurt. Now these gatherings are pure torment because I know I will ctb and destroy them

 

[Thoughtforms]

No. I constantly feel lonely. Doesn't matter who I'm with. There's always an emptiness in me

 

[NotWorthLiving]

I don't think it's possible for me to have fun. I kinda just float around in depression or numbness instead. Can't really do much about it.

 

[Jodes]

I like the start of a good coffee. Or time with anyone who understands me. But I always have heavy feeling in my chest.

 

[Didymus]

I stay at home and try to avoid everyone and everything. Don't watch tv, netflix or listen to radio anymore for a long time.
I can only think of how to die which occupies my mind the whole day.

 

[stargazer]

I'm sort of between jobs, so I have a fair amount of spare time. Basically I spend most of it just doing chores and waiting for my opportunity to CTB. Few things I'm waiting on (and a person, whenever they enter my life). Then I'm out. What relief it will bring me, those final moments. Phew.

I have fun by just being on here, surfing the web, checking emails, eating, sleeping, just normal stuff. It's fun for me.

 

[OkTotti]

I'm sort of between jobs, so I have a fair amount of spare time. Basically I spend most of it just doing chores and waiting for my opportunity to CTB. Few things I'm waiting on (and a person, whenever they enter my life). Then I'm out. What relief it will bring me, those final moments. Phew.

I have fun by just being on here, surfing the web, checking emails, eating, sleeping, just normal stuff. It's fun for me.

how come you can't receive PM's until January 2019? Wouldn't that be hindrance in finding the partner that you're looking for...

 

[Othermind]

I drink a lot.
But apart from that I don't do much, I've never been that into tv and film and now they either cause me panic attacks by bringing up bad memories or I just can't relate to the characters and how they decide to carry on with their shitty lives no matter what. It's a bit better with books as I've always been an avid reader but the panic and anxiety is always lurking around the corner so I've developed an ambivalent relationship with them.
Killing time when I'm not drunk is becoming increasingly difficult.